Thank you, I am so glad you liked it. The first thing I would say about your situation is to carefully examine whether you are just trying to ignore negative feelings and think ‘happy thoughts’ or you are actually thinking and focusing in a way that makes you FEEL better. The feeling is where we attract, not in casting aside negative thoughts, only to have that energy remain and grow.
Now, suppose that you begin to get clear about the kind of person that your soulmate is.  And you decide he or she is Abundant, Affectionate, Ambitious, Beautiful, Caring, Charismatic, Considerate, Creative, and so forth. Now, imagine that this person – who possess all of these wonderful qualities – was simultaneously looking back at you and secretly seeing you the way that you are right now, do you think that they would be proud of what they were seeing?  Would they be interested in hanging out with you, in dating you?  Chances are, the answer is no.
"Scientific experiments using a placebo effect for health reasons have shown that if you believe something will make you feel better. Rven if it is a sugar pill and not a true medication, it will cause you to think you feel better and then you do. ... Every time you think of a negative thought, you need three positives ones to negate it. If you focus all your positive energy on a positive outcome, it will happen. You can see this with prayer, as people focus on sending a positive message up in prayer for a positive outcome," Estes explains.
How does the law of attraction work if the person you love has moved to a different state? From the beginning he stated he wanted to only be friends because he was not ready for a long term relationship but we did all the things that people do in relationships and agreed to be monogamous. He has left for another state to take care of issues with family/children and says he doesn’t know when he’ll return. We don’t talk/text as before. I really developed strong feelings for him as we spent a lot of time together and I felt they were reciprocated to a point. Not sure what to do at this point. He has all the qualities I want in a friend/husband. I would love for us to be back together but as more than only friends. Please help
The Spiritual Explanation: Many people believe that the Law of Attraction works by aligning God or the Universe with our wishes. We are all made of energy, and our energy operates at different frequencies. We can change our frequency of energy with positive thoughts, especially gratitude for what we already have. By using grateful, positive thoughts and feelings and by focusing on our dreams — rather than our frustrations, we can change the frequency of our energy, and the law of attraction brings positive things into our lives. What we attract depends on where and how we focus our attention, but we must believe that it’s already ours, or soon will be.
You need to be clear about what you truly want in a relationship, there are lots of questions to be asked here, and the crucial thing is that you be honest with yourself.  Is it a life-long relationship?  Is it a traditional “get married”, raise a family relationship? Is it a committed relationship living apart?  You must decide what you truly want; sending the universe mixed messages via your thoughts will only lead to people who want different types of relationships coming into your life.
However, we also usually don’t pay attention to the amounts of money that we spend on a daily basis on small expenses until it’s a little too late. As Benjamin Franklin once said, “Beware of small expenses, a small leak will sink a great ship.” He was referring to the small payments for things we tend to forget about or overlook. Yet, it’s those same small expenses that can add up to a lot of money over the course of a month, year, or even a lifetime.
With that said, the primary error of “The Secret” / law of attraction is its view, or lack thereof, of God. In the law of attraction, God, if He even exists, is nothing more than a universal energy force that we manipulate by our thoughts and feelings. The law of attraction assumes a pantheistic (God is everything) view of God. The Secret denies the ideas of a personal God (with thoughts, feelings, and emotions) and a sovereign God (omnipotent and omniscient, perfectly in control of everything). The core message of “The Secret” is that we are in control of our own destiny. God knows the truth to be very different, “…All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be” (Psalm 139:16). Nebuchadnezzar, the greatest king of ancient Babylon and a prime candidate for someone who would know “The Secret,” declared, “Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified Him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; His kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as He pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back His hand or say to Him: ‘What have you done?’” (Daniel 4:34-35).

But aside from setting meaningful goals and carrying out all the other steps in the secret-to-success formula, in order to stay motivated, you need to focus on developing the willpower to follow through. Find things that inspire you. Find others who’ve achieved the success that you’re after and look to emulate them. Focus on developing the right amount of willpower to see things through.

Thank you for your comments. Hard to be positive when talking about the LOA. It's focus on blaming is pervasive. I am a positive psychologist and have proposed a new way of looking at attraction called the Principle of Attraction. As a Principle, like tends to attract like. Positive thoughts, feelings, actions, and words often attracts positivity...but not always. It's not a law, it's a principle, based on positive and social psychology.
But it’s only when you are okay with not being with them, that you open the path for the Law of Attraction to attract your specific person to you. Until you’re okay with not being with him/her, a part of you is resisting and making it impossible for you to have what you want. This means, according to the Law of Attraction, that until you’re okay with possibly losing him/her, it will be difficult for you to have the relationship you want with him/her. You have to be okay with not having him/her.
i broke up with my guy just a week back. we were in deep love.but he was realy irriated with me flirting around with other guyz.but i never had any affair with any guy while i was in relationship with him nigther did i cheat on him.dayz back first time he caught me lying ,well i had just called a guy friend of mine(who he dislikes) but i did not tell him about it while he was goin through my phone he just found his contact in the dialled no. and after that he broke up with me. but now when i have changed for him completely , i have stopped talkin 2 every guy friend of mine he doesnt trust me and he doesnt wanna come back.but i cant get over him,i realy love him truly. what do i do.i tried giving him some cute surprises and getting him back but he says his liking hasnt incresed for me at all.

Sure, you may have your fights, disagreements, etc.. I am not talking about creating some ‘perfect’ relationship where you never experience conflict or get annoyed by each other. I am talking about a relationship that feels right to the core, that doesn’t have all this ‘stuff’ in it that we really don’t want, but put up with because we think we have to.


Senior Pastor Cindy Hallam has been pastoring alongside her husband Walter Hallam for over 25 years. Together they have ministered to people around the world from La Marque, Texas. One of the ministry slogans 'Reaching Neighborhoods and Nations' has proven to be true in her first phase of ministry. She has a strong desire to impact the women and young people of ...


Think about two droplets of water that are slowly moving towards each other. What happens as they get closer? They eventually get close enough that they attract each other and become one droplet of water instead of two separate ones. This occurs because they are of like vibration. Now, think about the same phenomena with a droplet of water and a droplet of oil. No matter how close you put them together they will not become one with each other. This is because their vibrations are too different from one another.

I just order your book and looking forward to reattracting my ex and having him commit to me and us get married. I am feeling nervous and have tried everything else and I know what I am vibrating right now is the reason we aren’t together and he keeps getting with other people, so I am committing myself to learn this material and FINALLY working on myself so that I can reattract him and get the love and relationship that I have always wanted with him.
One Piece of the Universal Puzzle: Although much focus has been rightly given to the Law of Attraction, more so since the success of the works of Abraham-Hicks and Rhonda Byrne's The Secret, it is not the full picture. The Law of Attraction is the basic Universal Law which holds everything together but there are another seven Universal Laws referred to in the ancient mystical and secret teachings. By understanding all the Laws of the Universe, you will be able to understand the true nature of reality and how you can experience the life you intend. The Law of Attraction is a major stepping stone in that direction but do not be misled into believing that it is the only one.
Overall, this was a very easy, simple to read book. Having seen (or should I say "experienced") ET live, I was quite eager to read his book. I was somewhat disappointed that the pages of his book failed to capture his essence more effectively. I will admit to being surprised of the numerous grammatical errors I encountered especially since he is an educator. Finally, although he may be referred to as the "hip-hop preacher" in some circles, there were a few banned words included here and there. This is NOT a religious book by any means.
And NOT EVERYTHING is your fault. As a psychologist, you should know that we have 65000 thoughts a day and most of them are not conscious. In that case how are you supposed to know that you were thinking so subconsciously? (SUBCONSCIOUS thoughts matter too!). In fact, LoA users use their subconscious mind as a great asset. The truth about the law of attraction is actually simple.
However, I recognize that certain particular accomplishments tend to mean success to most people. These are: finding a job and a career that has status in our society and that brings with it enough financial reward that it is possible to live comfortably. This is the familiar picture of a house with a picket fence. The particular kind of work they will engage in will otherwise vary widely. Part of this success—in the eyes of most people—is a loving family, usually including children--and good friends. And having a place in the community.

this book is not really about money and prestige, or maybe i should say, not just about them. it's really about changing your life and, incidentally, attaining your goals, whatever they might be. it's easy reading, and it's important information. you do have to be open to the possibility that you can change the way you think, and maybe that might influence how your life plays out. it won't work for you if you are committed to continuing to think exactly the way you always have, or if you don't want anything in your life to change in any way. but otherwise, this book is great!


Intimacy means knowing each other and sharing most coveted parts of your lives. The self-revealing behavior, when reciprocated well, forms an emotional bond which is hard to break. With continues sharing, this bond tends to strengthen over time and bring the partners much closer. Friendship is the first step to intimacy, so before you decide to get into love, make sure you both share good friendship.
You can’t control others, but you can control yourself.  You can control how you choose to perceive and feel. This is the oldest piece of empowerment psychology out there, but it’s so true.  It starts with you on every single level.  The love and relationships that you want to experience start with self.  How’s your relationship with you?  It’s time to transform it, and never stop.
After my first book was published in 2000, I spent two and a half years writing a novel. But it never felt right. I didn't even name it—it was the poor, misshapen beast child I kept hidden under my bed. Then I showed it to my agent. "None of the things you do well are in evidence here," she said. I was devastated, then relieved: I had failed, and now I could stop. If you don't feel a shiver of excitement or fear, if there's no emotional risk involved, let it go. You can't discount how hard it will be to leave your bad marriage or stop writing your bad book, but if you're unhappy, nothing can get better as long as the status quo stays the status quo.
You claim that "positive thoughts always resulting in positive things" is not the basis of the LOA. In part you are correct. The foundational basis in science, as I alluded to in the article was that thought stuff particles travel through ether (not air) and interact with formless stuff to create whatever it is that you are thinking about. This was how "the law" started.
You can’t attract someone who loves you for who you are, if you are not really BEING who you are. Not being yourself because you think there is something wrong with you will also lead you to attracting people who mirror these feelings back to you, which to those unaware of how law of attraction operates, will falsely take these experiences and encounters as ‘proof’ they are right in feeling that way about themselves.
Yes, I am familiar with that phrase, although not sure how it applies to this situation. I am the source and you would like me to consider myself? I do not have an employer. Psychology Today provides a forum for articles and discussions. They do not hire me or pay me. They are not the source of this information. I take full responsibility for the content.

In the short term, the cigarette smoker cannot bear to quit because the pain of withdrawal and detox from cigarettes is just too high to bear. Similarly, the cravings that a person might feel who’s overweight and needs to be dieting, which eventually turn into physical withdrawals from things like fat, sugar, and carbohydrates, bring on an intense amount of pain in the short term.

×