No. 11: Finally and most importantly, believe in what you do. When things get tough, as they inevitably do, it helps to be doing something you feel is important. What keeps me going is the belief that what I do makes a difference to others, and I’m fortunate that so many readers let me know I’ve made a difference to them. And that, in the end, may be the biggest reason of all for why I’m still here.
Hey Elizabeth! So when visualizing the love life I want, I know im supposed to focus on the feeling of the relationship. But when I do, should I be visualizing an ideal partner? Is it okay to visualize a person I had a romantic encounter with but no longer want to have a relationship with them? It’s just easy to get the good feelings from this past relationship, but I want to meet someone new.
I originally came across this list when I was staring at some papers on a refrigerator owned by someone who was very successful – both personally and financially. My family and I had just spent the night as a guest in a great house in the suburbs of Boston. We were living life large as we played pool in the rec room, drank wine from the wine cellar, and enjoyed a dip in the hot tub. The problem was, neither of the couples in the house owned the property or the life we were pretending to have. You see, my friends were house sitting for the original owner and they had invited us to stay for the weekend.
With that said, the primary error of “The Secret” / law of attraction is its view, or lack thereof, of God. In the law of attraction, God, if He even exists, is nothing more than a universal energy force that we manipulate by our thoughts and feelings. The law of attraction assumes a pantheistic (God is everything) view of God. The Secret denies the ideas of a personal God (with thoughts, feelings, and emotions) and a sovereign God (omnipotent and omniscient, perfectly in control of everything). The core message of “The Secret” is that we are in control of our own destiny. God knows the truth to be very different, “…All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be” (Psalm 139:16). Nebuchadnezzar, the greatest king of ancient Babylon and a prime candidate for someone who would know “The Secret,” declared, “Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified Him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; His kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as He pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back His hand or say to Him: ‘What have you done?’” (Daniel 4:34-35).
Hi Angel – As I explained in my book, it’s all about you. Distance doesn’t matter with the Law of Attraction, even when using it for love and a specific person. You matter. Focus on creating the relationship you want and don’t worry about what you think are problems. Work on your thoughts, feelings, and vibration. Let go of how it’ll work. You have the ability to change your life and the Universe fully supports you.
Thank you for your comments. Hard to be positive when talking about the LOA. It's focus on blaming is pervasive. I am a positive psychologist and have proposed a new way of looking at attraction called the Principle of Attraction. As a Principle, like tends to attract like. Positive thoughts, feelings, actions, and words often attracts positivity...but not always. It's not a law, it's a principle, based on positive and social psychology.
It is also important to remember to work on feeling better incrementally, and not trying to manifest things that are just too much of a stretch for our CURRENT vibration. For example, someone really struggling with money would probably not really feel it was possible to start making 10,000 a month in income, and to set that type of goal without already being able to feel that abundant right now, would result in lots of frustration, and the lack of results would just worsen the energy. It is also a good idea to put your focus on just feeling better overall, and not too much on specific manifestations. A lot can happen without specific focus when we just raise our vibration overall. You will notice cool things start to happen, and this will strengthen your trust in the process, which will make it easier to manifest specific things.
There are dozens of different ways of incorporating your knowledge of the Law of Attraction into your everyday life, letting your new skills shape your day from morning to night. While that might sound like an overwhelming undertaking, the truth is that simple changes have powerful consequences when you’re working with the Law of Attraction. After a few weeks of practising your new approach, much of it will become second nature.
Shelly Bullard, MFT is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Love Coach and Spiritual Teacher. She's the author of the eBook: How to Become the Most Attractive Version of Yourself which she offers for FREE (click here to receive your free copy). She's also the instructor of the popular mbg courses: How To Become The Most Attractive Version of Yourself & How to Attract a Partner Who's Ready for Deep, Devoted Love. Shelly believes that when you access the experience of Love within yourself, your relationships become deeply fulfilling and you become the person you’re meant to be. She was named the “Love Guru” as one of the 100 Women to Watch in Wellness by mindbodygreen, and her deepest passion is living and practicing love and relationships as a spiritual path. To learn more about how she can help you create more love in your life, visit her at: shellybullard.com.
Step 1: Essentially, you need to make the decision that you really want to attract this life partner. Then, truly commit to the idea of spending the rest of your life with this person. Making this commitment may involve processing old wounds (e.g. via journaling or therapy). Hopefully, the past can be left behind and you can opt to embrace hope instead of fear.
Dear Elisabeth…I am in relationship with my boyfriend almost 8 years..We were very in love. But during these years he did to me something I couldn´t forgive him for many years..I were very much angry with him all these years..but I was also still in love. I think I was so angry that I was very often pushing him out of me without even noticing that. Yesterday he told me he does not know if he wants to be with me anymore. Because in last two years he was feeling very alone, told me I was not listeting. He was right. I have forgiven him already. But I did not notice I was behaving this way all these years. I am very sorry for that. Because I forgived and I love him all the time. I want him back. But he is not sure any more he loves me. He likes me very much. But he told me I destroyed the love in him. He does not leave in this moment. He told me he needs time. I told him I want to repair everything, I want to change. I do not want anymore to behave in this way. I did a big mistake and I am sure I can change. How to make him change his mind? How to let him find the love again? I know he likes me a lot..and that I am important for him. But it seems it is not enough anymore. Thanks
The work of quantum physicists during recent years has helped to shine greater light on the incredible impact that the power of the mind has on our lives and the universe in general. The more that this idea is explored by scientists and great thinkers alike, the greater an understanding we have on just how significant a role the mind plays in shaping our lives and the world around us.
I kept hearing about this book. I expected it to be a new age, wish on a star book. But, it was a good read. It reminded me that, at least to some extent, we do create our own reality by the attitude we project. If we are a grump, we attract other grumps, not happy persons, to us. And so on. It is a quick read, a fun read, lots of white space, easy to understand and assimilate, no high psychology words, no mumbo jumbo. Good illustrations. Definitely written for the layman. I've also seen Losier's videos and they are more of the same.
- If I don't have much respect for my body and health or I'm stuck in the "fat" mentality, then I won't stick to a good diet. The key isn't to go from 0 to 100 (from eating fast food regularly to becoming vegetarian, for example). The mind cannot make such a huge switch in a short amount of time due to all the patterns one has developed over the years. Again, psychology 101. So simple yet so many get it wrong. There is no "perfect" diet. But when you have enough respect for your body, you would definitely have the motivation to stick to transition (
Hi Elizabeth~ I have read your book a few times and have one thing that I am confused by. I was in a relationship with someone a few months back, but life circumstances got in the way a bit. These life circumstances have changed now and I would like him back in my life. I think that there is much potential here, but do not feel that I know him well enough to know that he is “the one”. Should I focus my energy on manifesting him specifically? Or should I not focus on manifesting him since I am not 100% sure he is the right guy and just focus on manifesting a life partner? And we have not talked in a while, so I assume I should NOT contact him and just focus on myself and on the manifestation? Please advise. Thanks!!!
I have bought Your books and been an avid fan of your blog! I have always had great success manifesting my desires until recently. My relationship of 4 years has ended- on his part– I have followed Your steps, used EFT, meditation, visualization, and have been working on my vibration. However, the Communication on his end has become increasingly negative (whereas he was not so together) and I am Aware of the desire- the RELATIONsHIP with him- has not manifested. I have been working on releasing resistance & detachment. Any tips or suggestions? Guidance would be appreciated.
Beyond a shadow of a doubt I know this to be true — we’ve all set huge spoken and unspoken intentions for love. We’ve all asked for it. Know that sometimes love comes in unexpected ways, ways in which our ego’s would say “hey that was horrible.” But remember that each and every experience is a stepping stone to where you are going. Ask and it is given. Stop judging how it’s coming to you, instead know it is and get focused on the hopeful expectation of what life brings when you get our of your own way.
"Scientific experiments using a placebo effect for health reasons have shown that if you believe something will make you feel better. Rven if it is a sugar pill and not a true medication, it will cause you to think you feel better and then you do. ... Every time you think of a negative thought, you need three positives ones to negate it. If you focus all your positive energy on a positive outcome, it will happen. You can see this with prayer, as people focus on sending a positive message up in prayer for a positive outcome," Estes explains.
Thank you for responding, but how do I find out where and when I went wrong? The person that I have been on and off with for ten years, how do I get that back on track with him without the resentment and just have a good family life. I will only allow myself to go but so far because my children comes first and that is partly his problem it’s like he wants me to love him but hate my kids or just want them to go away. Do I apply the LOA or do I let go and focus on my blessings which are my children and many other things?
How does a Soul Call work? Well, remember that everything in the Universe is first created on the inner plane of ideas and emotions before it materializes. There’s plenty of scientific research that has proven that people who are thousands of miles away can actually affect each other’s heartbeat and capacity to experience love simply by thinking loving thoughts about each other.
Thank you so much for such long reply! The more I’m working on myself with LOA, somehow the more my feelings are changing. Deep down, I know there will be more chances for me out there and therefore, I will meet the love of my life but my brain tells me that I shouldn’t have done that. Feels like my heart and my brain are in different places. Sometimes it’s quite the challenge. But I learned that I need to care for myself first and foremost!
This word “abundant” in the Greek is perisson, meaning “exceedingly, very highly, beyond measure, more, superfluous, a quantity so abundant as to be considerably more than what one would expect or anticipate.” In short, Jesus promises us a life far better than we could ever imagine, a concept reminiscent of 1 Corinthians 2:9: “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.” The apostle Paul tells us that God is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, and He does it by His power, a power that is at work within us if we belong to Him (Ephesians 3:20).