The fact that we build evidence to support our beliefs is not evidence that a law of attraction exists. Why do innocent babies attract negativity that causes them to be in the ICU with fatal illnesses? Why do happy children get hit by cars or murdered by terrorists? Why do people who cheat and lie and abuse others, sometimes prosper and become leaders in society? If we are using anecdotal evidence to support claims, I will have plenty of examples.
Often times what you experience in others are perfect reflections of thy self, in some beautiful (and not so) way. So it’s important to ask the questions — “What can I learn from this relationship about myself? What here could even be symbolic about ME?” Dealing with a bully doesn’t mean you ARE a bully — but might truly be a reflection of a fear you need to work at, (since bully’s are just small and fearful). So be open to it. If you experience it, you own it…somehow.
So who is your Soulmate? What does he or she look like? What are their qualities? What is it that makes them unique and attractive to you? For many of us, this journey towards our Soulmate begins by first experiencing what we do not want. Funny how life works, isn’t it? If you have been, or currently find yourself, in a relationship where you find that things are not flowing, it feels like it’s too much work, you argue and fight a lot, you don’t feel like you are compatible or complement each other, the passion is long gone, you constantly feel anxious about the relationship and you’re struggling to be happy, instead of feeling stronger, supported and inspired you feel weakened, or the person is in another relationship and not available to you, chances are that you’re not with your soulmate.
"The more powerful part of this is understanding that when we do that, we put ourselves at the effect rather than being at the cause, so understanding this, it's more about us being at the cause rather than the effect, us being the star of our own movie, not trying to be a cameo in someone else's. The power of this is that when we begin to live in the authentic expression of who we are, when we begin to act in that energy state, there's something very magnetic about it, and it becomes a bit of a paradox. When we're doing what we're passionate about, it's like we attract others who are resonating with that, and we may find that if we start to act on our passions, if we start to become this best version of ourself, if we start to focus on ourselves and knowing that we're already 100% whole and complete, there's more likelihood that from that energy state, we will attract other people that also resonate with it. We may find out that that original ex that we wanted back into our life doesn't actually even resonate.
I know the LOA says when you want to manifest a specific person you have to be willing to lose them – you have to let go and be ok with not being with them in order to manifest the relationship you want. It also says that you should visualize the relationship you want with this person as if you already have it. How can one do both? How can I imagine being in a relationship with this person but let them go and be ok with not the being with them at the same time?
Sure, you may have your fights, disagreements, etc.. I am not talking about creating some ‘perfect’ relationship where you never experience conflict or get annoyed by each other. I am talking about a relationship that feels right to the core, that doesn’t have all this ‘stuff’ in it that we really don’t want, but put up with because we think we have to.
The awesome LOA blogger Melody Fletcher termed the manifestations that show up to indicate we are on the right path as ‘breadcrumbs.’ The thing is though, many of us misinterpret them as ‘bad’ things that show us we still don’t have what we want. Sometimes, a manifestation is not just going to fall right into our lap—this is especially true of ‘wants’ that are really big and important to us–we typically have a lot of resistance to work through. Just allowing it in, in its full form, immediately, usually can’t happen.
Expect that the universe is more likely to give you things if you’re already grateful for what it has provided to you. Giving an asked-for birthday gift to someone and barely receiving a thank you, you’d likely avoid providing a second gift. On the other hand, you’d get excited about giving a repeat gift to someone who enthusiastically expressed their appreciation for your gift. Imagine the universe in the same way.
The thing is that there is no way to know for sure if another guy is gay or bi in most situations, so it's harder to casually meet a guy on the street or at some social function without possibly getting into an awkward situation when you try to feel him out. This means that the options that are left to us can be...less wholesome situations. Combine that with the naturally high sex drive of a male, then multiply that by two and...well, you know how it is.
If you want things in your life to get better, focus on the solution, not on the problem. Your thoughts generate the action you take in your life. If your thoughts are soaked in negativity, your action can't be resourceful. Instead of focusing on the elimination of a problem, focus on what you can create instead. Replace worrying with the projection of positive images.
Also, for reasons that I do not need to belabor, it is advantageous for an individual to be especially bright, unusually attractive, talented, and, even tall and strong. None of these qualities guarantees success, but they all help. But put together they will not add up to very much unless certain other qualities of mind and personality are present. In other words, having all these advantages will not prevent some people from botching up; and we all know someone like that.
14. Solve your own problems. You’ll find that by coming up with your own solutions, you’ll develop a competitive edge. Masura Ibuka, the co-founder of SONY, said it best: “You never succeed in technology, business, or anything by following the others.” There’s also an old Asian saying that I remind myself of frequently. It goes like this: “A wise man keeps his own counsel.”
Just in case I haven’t made my point clearly enough, the attraction process is all about how we feel, so it is really good to get into the feelings that lie behind our desires, as much as we can. Think about what sort of feelings you want in your relationship. Are you after a sense of ease in interacting with this person, without any drama? Do you want someone who shares your same passions and interests? Then, visualize yourself in these encounters.
The preparation for welcoming your soul mate requires that you make a conscious commitment to start healing the deepest wounds of your heart. Notice that I said “start” healing the deepest wounds of your heart, because for the majority of us, this is a lifelong process and it doesn’t mean you have to be fully healed to manifest your One. In fact, one of the things that a soul mate will do is HELP you to heal your deepest emotional wounds, and chances are you’ll be helping them heal their deepest emotional wounds as well. BUT you must be willing to clear out all of the past hurts, anger, resentments, and anything else that makes up the thick wall of protection and distrust that you have built around your heart so that you can start welcoming love in.
Thank you so much for your book. I have read it and used the techniques which have worked so far. I have a few questions…my ex and I broke up back in April. We were in a long distance relationship for about 6-7 months. Really close, basically my best friend. The distance was too hard and she couldn’t do it anymore. We still talked every now and then, flirting and reminiscing and catching up. But here recently she told me she has a boyfriend now. Then about a month later she asks me to go to a concert with her and that I can stay with her at her house, which was something I manifested but she still has a boyfriend. I’ve followed the steps of giving her the cold shoulder and making her miss me but how can I do that when she has a boyfriend? My next next question has to do with thinking. I read my scripted visualization and look at my vision board twice a day. It’s really uplifting. I send out heart energy which has worked because the other day she texted me a picture of a few things I’ve given her and that she could never throw them away. My question is, can thinking about her and all the good times we had and thinking about our future together, can that delay results and should I just stick to doing the scripted visualizations and sending heart energy? Thank you so much!
Today, Jesse Duplantis is one of the most unique and beloved ministers of our generation. He not only shares his memorable mix of strong, biblical preaching and hilarious life lessons through his television program, but also through evangelistic meetings in churches and convention centers, local church outreaches, books that have been translated in many languages, magazines, the internet, social media, and his many inspirational audio/visual teaching resources. Jesse Duplantis is spreading the Gospel of Jesus in a way that is reaching people and changing lives, one soul at a time.
There's an old saying, perhaps you've heard it, "consider the source"? Do you not see the irony in your criticism of LOA, classifying it as a "pseudoscience", with your employer being PSYCHOLOGY TODAY? if I'm not mistaken, has the field of psychology itself, in It's infancy as well as today, not been debunked, by "actual science", referring to it also as "pseudoscience"?
It’s quite clear then that in order to succeed in life at any endeavor, we need to set specific goals. But, not only do they have to be specific, they have to be S.M.A.R.T.E.R. goals — goals that are specific, meaningful, achievable, relevant, and time-based. Those goals also need to be constantly evaluated and the plans re-adjusted in order to attain them.