And NOT EVERYTHING is your fault. As a psychologist, you should know that we have 65000 thoughts a day and most of them are not conscious. In that case how are you supposed to know that you were thinking so subconsciously? (SUBCONSCIOUS thoughts matter too!). In fact, LoA users use their subconscious mind as a great asset. The truth about the law of attraction is actually simple.
1) The Soulmate List. The first list is a list of ‘Green Light’ qualities and attributes that you’d like your soulmate to have.  In other words, this is what you want to “get” in a Soulmate.   In this list, you’ll describe all of the physical and non-physical characteristics you envision your soulmate to have. Here you want to include things that will begin to describe the kind of man or woman who would really make your heart sing.
"[Manifesting destiny and the Law of Attraction are best explained by] the Law of Karma. It basically states that you will get negative if you think negative. For example, if you say, 'I never win anything' and you enter a raffle, you simply won’t win. You declared you won’t. If you focus on winning, and the person next to you puts out more positive energy than you do, you won’t win. The key is to give out the same energy you want back. If you want happiness, you look for the happiness and surround yourself with it and yours will grow," Estes explains.
So, while part of the secret to success lies in the principle of taking massive action on a daily basis, it also requires a shift in thinking. You have to look at pain in the long term as the driver, and not pain in the short term. When you can associate enough pain to the long term of not doing something than the pleasure of putting it off any longer, then the real magic can start to happen.
Michael Losier is the best on the law of attraction issue. He teaches one exactly how to master the art of "believe". It is easy to tell people that the law of attraction works; however, the LOA works if one firmly believes in receiving something specific. Now what if one can not convince oneself to deeply believe? Michael has a whole chapter on how one can realistically think ones desire into reality.
Your book says that one must let the person they love miss them. In my case, things are fine between us and we are great friends. I have no reason to avoid him or not talk to him. Then what is it that I can do to make him miss me? Also, is it really important to maintain distance for LOA to work? Can I continue talking to him everyday like I always have and still manifest an ideal relationship with him?
If you are really struggling with relationships, there is something happening deep inside that is creating the outcomes you keep experiencing. You are getting something you want, you are protecting yourself from something you fear. You have some sort of image of yourself that deems you unworthy of love. Again, this may not vibe with your conscious mind, that is in a constant state of wanting happiness and good things. You are not cursed. You are not some horrible person that only deserves douches. You have the power to change this, if you are willing to do the inner work and take responsibility. And by responsibility, I don’t mean blame. Two very different energies there. One empowers us, and the other keeps us feeling terrible.
When you want something so bad, whether it’s your own business, love, a better marriage, whatever it is, and you get so obsessed with wanting it that you won’t allow yourself to be happy unless you obtain it, you go through life in a desparate lower frequency state. This desperation throws you into a Pseudo Self. You start living outside in instead of inside out. Your gifts become dimmed which means you become less potent. You pack less punch in this world. You also become angry and resentful. So your state changes and your energy beomes low. You then start go through life crossing fingers and hoping. The longer this happens, the less you believe. And if you don’t believe, you won’t put any action behind building anything. Now you watch others build their dreams and become a spectator. Sound familiar? Basically, you give up. Then you hear about a fast easy concept that can save you. There’s a chance you can still get what you want! A vine to pull you out of your quicksand. Of course you’re going to jump on that train.
Attracting a good relationship doesn't mean that the relationship is going to be perfect or even permanent. Remember that you will attract someone who matches who you are in a given moment. If you or your partner change, the relationship may no longer be compatible. Sometimes we're meant to learn something from a relationship, and then move on when we're done.
4) No Plan: If the best way for me to achieve my goals is to live as if I’ve already achieved them, then there is no reason to make further plans to do so! Making plans shows the universe that you doubt its ability and lack faith. Doubt is negative and you will then attract more negative and not get your desired item. In the book The Secret, Jack Canfield proposed, “Our job is not to figure out the how.” “…trust that the Universe will figure out how to manifest it.” Studies show that this way of thinking results in greater short term satisfaction, but less motivation and lower chance of achieving goals. Curious that Jack Canfield’s website sells a program to teach you how to make an “Action Plan.”
I look at the picture of my desire and send him love and happiness, in addition I imagine a pink spiral all around him and me. I have done this for two days and I feel liberated I feel like everything I was worrying about has disappeared I feel a different person seriously. It is like I have let it go whilst still feeling the energy inyhands and feet. Am not sure if this is right or not if Elizabeth could clarify, but I feel great.

The Law of Attraction for Love for a specific person works by focusing on yourself. It isn’t about the specific person you’re in love with. I know he’s all you can think about right now, but if you want to use the Law of Attraction you have to focus on you. Do the things that make you happy. Raise your vibration. Focus on doing what makes you feel good.

By choosing to stay in an endless cycle of negativity and by dwelling on what isn’t, rather than what could be, how is the universe expected to be clear on what you are looking for? Focusing on the bad luck that you may have had in past relationships or dwelling on your inadequacies can only serve to further increase these misfortunes and hold you back from the love that you so truly deserve.
No matter what comes up, don't shut any of it down because it seems silly, irrational or whatever... if it is coming up, it's relevant and a very real feeling and belief that must be addressed. Pay attention to any memories that float in your mind...even if they have nothing to do with romantic relationships, there is a similar thread energetically, and will help you uncover beliefs and feelings that are blocking you.
What Frequency Are You On: Everything, including yourself, your thoughts and anything else you may or may not want to experience, is pure energy vibrating at different frequencies. The basic premise of the Law of Attraction is that like energy attracts like energy. You attract to yourself that which you are in vibrational harmony with, not that which you long for or even deserve. Your dominant frequency is determined by your dominant mental attitude, which itself is determined by your habitual thoughts and beliefs. Simply put, a positive mental attitude attracts positive experiences and circumstances while a negative mental attitude attracts those conditions that we deem negative or unwanted.

Thanks for stopping by. Glad the post resonated with you. I think it depends. For some people, that focusing on something different may end up improving the current relationship in some way. For example, your shift in beliefs and energy may help you line up with a different version of your partner more often that is more conducive to what you prefer, and you find you are happier in this relationship and don’t feel like you necessarily want a new one.
Think about the qualities you seek in the person you want to attract. These qualities are very personal and vary from individual to individual. Remember, there are no limits to what you can want.  Be specific about what is important to you; think about what you want in detail.  A great way to get some clarity is to make a list of the qualities you find attractive and the values that you admire in other people. Making a list or journaling our expectations is a powerful tool when applying the law of attraction to any facet of your life.
Many people talk about success. They say they want to be successful at something. But, when prodded, they don’t provide specifics because they haven’t really created those specifics in their minds. Sure, they might want to earn more money, drive a nicer car, get a better job, or travel to some far-off destination, but they haven’t set specific and measurable goals that are written down on paper.
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