"It's nothing specific that you're going to do. It's more about the energy underneath the doing that's going to then become magnetic, or become something that then attracts someone specific into your life. Knowing that, this is my saying I say all the time, or it's a very common saying, but you don't attract what you want, but you attract who you are. This also works for relationships. The first part I want to give to you is understanding how we must be in our own movie. Any time we're asking this question, we're automatically coming from the frame of us trying to become a part of someone else's movie, especially if it's someone specific. The idea is that we are putting this person on a pedestal, and we're doing everything we can to get them into our life. We're trying to get into their reality, into their movie, and bring them into ours.

I hope you found this post enlightening, and it instilled a sense of hope in you, a spark of possibility that the relationship you want, not just any relationship, can happen for you. Please let me know your thoughts in the comments. What part resonated with you the most? Did you have any insights into your own situation reading this? Do you have any tips to share about attracting love? Looking forward to reading your comments and having a chat!
I am in a situation where the man I just got back into my life (applying the LOA) is saying he just wants to be friends. I don’t understand why because when we are together things are great. When we first got back cool after a nasty seperation, he was reaching out to me constantly. Then I told him I wanted to spend more time with him and it seems after I said that, things went sour and he jumped from wanting to be around me to saying nothing is there anymore and he just wants to be friends. No warning or anything. This is the man I want to be around. I am very happy with him and cannot be in the same place I was with him when we were on bad terms, I refuse to go back to that space! I have been saying affirmations like “I am fun to be around;I Am someone that comes naturally to ____; I attract ____ naturally. etc” I guess i’m in a rush to spend time with him due to lost time when we weren’t talking. PLease help me! I have a strong desire to be with and around this man.

Abundant Life began in the fall of 1994, as God took the initiative to reveal Himself in a greater way to His people in Jacksonville, North Carolina. A small band of believers determined to worship GOD in spirit and truth and not after the traditions of men, gathered together for the first time. Only two weeks later, GOD touched the hearts of the Pastor and congregation of the Calvary Seventh Day Adventist Church to open their doors on October 23, 1994. Fifty-five faithful saints worshiped that day. On the same day the Combined Choir was formed with 24 members singing. During the course of the next two months, Men, Youth, and Mass Choirs were formed.
Thank you for responding, but how do I find out where and when I went wrong? The person that I have been on and off with for ten years, how do I get that back on track with him without the resentment and just have a good family life. I will only allow myself to go but so far because my children comes first and that is partly his problem it’s like he wants me to love him but hate my kids or just want them to go away. Do I apply the LOA or do I let go and focus on my blessings which are my children and many other things?
Think about the strengths and energies that make you unique. When you were a child you thought to yourself “Wow, I am ME. Nobody else is me or can feel the feelings I feel. They’re mine alone. This energy is uniquely my energy.” Then, of course, the world trained you out of this way of seeing things. You wanted to be the same as everyone else (or at least, they wanted you to be the same). Breaking free and removing failure from your vocabulary allows you to follow your bliss with ease.
I also believe that out of nearly 7 billion people on this planet at this particular point and time in history, there is one person alive, living reasonably close to you – or planning to move there soon – who is the best possible match for you.  In other words, out of all the people who exist, there’s one person who is exactly who you’ve been waiting for, and to that person, you are exactly what he/she has waited for, too.
6) Use this time to grow in your ability to be more patient, more loving, more giving, more forgiving and more gentle and kind to yourself.  Get your ducks in a row, explore new hobbies and interests and keep on growing your current friendships.  Continue to work on all your mental and emotional blocks to love and, most importantly, continue to have faith that he or she is out there and that you can’t miss each other.
I’m glad my book on using the Law of Attraction for love of a specific person worked for you! You should follow the same steps you followed the first time. It’s okay if you think about him, but you should focus on making yourself happy. Instead of thinking of the feeling of “feeling in love”, think of the emotion of “feeling loved.” That’s what you’re ultimately looking for in your relationship.
Thank you, I am so glad you liked it. The first thing I would say about your situation is to carefully examine whether you are just trying to ignore negative feelings and think ‘happy thoughts’ or you are actually thinking and focusing in a way that makes you FEEL better. The feeling is where we attract, not in casting aside negative thoughts, only to have that energy remain and grow.
It would be impossible to publish research in any respectable peer-reviewed psychology journal that was not up to this high standard with concomitant rigorous statistical analyses. These are the standards in psychology. When someone comes up with a new theory in psychology or any other science, for that theory to be of any use, it has to be able to make predictions and those predictions have to be verifiable. If there is no way to disprove a theory, it can explain everything that happens, yet it doesn't predict anything specific that can be tested, it is considered a poor theory.

The Law of Attraction is one of the better known universal laws. The theory behind the Law of Attraction is that we create our own realities. Not only do we attract things we want,  we also attract things we don't want. We attract the people in our lives, the stuff inside our homes, and the money in our bank accounts through our thoughts and feelings.

I have been struck over the years by how many people fail despite growing up with all the advantages of money and good health; and by how many others there are who start off impaired and impeded by emotional and physical illness and being born into dysfunctional and abusive families, and still manage to succeed. Included in those success stories is a man who could not attend school growing up because of a phobia which then prevented him from leaving his neighborhood, but who ended up owning three or four food franchises. He had previously failed in one business after another. Another man with a similar story ended up going to medical school at a somewhat advanced age and became a pediatrician.
10) Blame Yourself: As the LOA is supposed to be a perfect, universal law, positivity should ALWAYS attract more positivity. The corollary of this is that you alone are completely responsible for any goal that was not successfully achieved, no matter how unrealistic the goal. This assumes that you not only control your thoughts and actions, but also those of everyone around you…and nature. The fact is, that you don’t. Sorry to break that to you.
3) Follow your heart.  If there’s something you feel inspired to do, do it. If there’s something you don’t want to do, don’t do it.  You don’t have to kiss 100 frogs; you don’t have to go out to meet people, go on online dating sites, or do anything that does not feel right.   If you are the kind of person who likes to stay at home, your soulmate could literally have a crash on your yard! It’s happened before.  Only do what you want to do and feels right!
The thing that's grand about spending your time thinking about the universe is that it makes you feel insignificant. I don't mean that in a bad way. If you understand that we've now discovered entire solar systems that contain planets similar to Earth, and that those are just the ones we know about, since most of the stars we've looked at are within about 300 light- years of Earth and the distance to the center of our galaxy is nearly 100 times that—then you realize that the laundry you've left undone and the dumb thing you said yesterday are about as significant as slime mold.
When you protect yourself from disappointment, loneliness, heartache and failure, you often deny yourself the thing that you want the most. You swap risk for unhappiness. If you’re searching for love, for instance, you need to allow yourself to go on the journey. Someone out there is searching for you just as desperately as you’re searching for them. Maybe you already know them? Maybe they’re about to walk into your life (through the power of the law of attraction) just as soon as you make yourself energetically ready for them?

Manifesting destiny and attracting the appropriate energies is, of course, a very fickle, tricky concept. To learn more about how to play it right and build the life you've always dreamed of, I consulted with experts Cali Estes, PhD, Life Coach, Recovery Coach and Founder of The Addictions Coach; April Masini, relationship and etiquette expert and popular media resource; and Davida Rappaport, intuitive psychic with over 35 years of experience. Here are 11 ways to understand the Law of Attraction and how it applies to manifesting the destiny you desire.


Many people have limiting beliefs which keep them from allowing abundance and happiness into their lives. If this describes you, realize that you must first change your limiting beliefs into thoughts that you are deserving, worthy, lovable, desirable, and capable—as well as smart enough, strong enough, attractive enough, rich enough, good enough, and “enough” in every other way that matters to you.
Hi Elizabeth – thank you for the wonderful insight into attracting an ex. I got your book and have started doing everything you suggest. I could feel my vibrations rising and went to sleep with a wonderful open heart feeling. When I woke up the doubts of his intentions started filtering into my brain. I quickly tried to cover them up with ______ and ______ together forever and we are 1 type of mantra. I switch between what will be will be and positive thought. We lived together f or 7 years and he has moved out. I have left his cupboards ready for him to come back but am worried that I am not getting the detachment thing right. Will it come in time if I just carry on practising everything you have suggested? Thank you for your time and care. JG

I stumbled on your page a couple weeks ago. I’ve been coping with post partum depression for the past few months. Although medication has absolutely helped take the edge off, ever since reading your words I’ve felt a consistent and steady rise in my feelings of happiness. The medication helped stabilize my depression, that’s true, but your words helped me tap into my joy. Joy I haven’t felt in years, possibly since I was a child myself.


The thing that's grand about spending your time thinking about the universe is that it makes you feel insignificant. I don't mean that in a bad way. If you understand that we've now discovered entire solar systems that contain planets similar to Earth, and that those are just the ones we know about, since most of the stars we've looked at are within about 300 light- years of Earth and the distance to the center of our galaxy is nearly 100 times that—then you realize that the laundry you've left undone and the dumb thing you said yesterday are about as significant as slime mold.
How do you imagine your perfect man or woman to be? Are they tall, dark and handsome? Are they career minded; family orientated; sporty; introverted; extroverted?We all like to think that we know what qualities we are looking for in our dream partner. After all, we have daydreamed about them enough! But how well do you know what you are really looking for from your next big love?

“I had a superior experience with Abundant Life…Jake was very helpful and accommodating. Their follow-up site visit to my house in January was very valuable to me in helping to identify the best place to locate the wood stove and to provide the necessary non-combustible surfaces in a tricky area. The products they carry are very high quality, yet fairly priced…”
I understand your scepticism about the LOA as I am someone who is open minded about it. However, I kind of lost confidence in your arguments when you started to present basic premises about the LOA incorrectly. For example, the primary focus of the law of attraction is not about material wealth. It is about self development, self love and the journey to self completeness within the context of mindfulness and positive thinking. This is a premise that is widely used within peer researched clinical therapies as well as many religions. Proponents of the law of attraction do not campaign for everyone to achieve selfish material gain and wealth. I have not heard or read anyone, no matter what level in their LOA journey that they are at. Their point is about the power of a positive mindset, a principle I am very much a supporter of and as I said, this is not unique to the LOA.
How does a Soul Call work? Well, remember that everything in the Universe is first created on the inner plane of ideas and emotions before it materializes. There’s plenty of scientific research that has proven that people who are thousands of miles away can actually affect each other’s heartbeat and capacity to experience love simply by thinking loving thoughts about each other.
The Spiritual Explanation: Many people believe that the Law of Attraction works by aligning God or the Universe with our wishes. We are all made of energy, and our energy operates at different frequencies. We can change our frequency of energy with positive thoughts, especially gratitude for what we already have. By using grateful, positive thoughts and feelings and by focusing on our dreams — rather than our frustrations, we can change the frequency of our energy, and the law of attraction brings positive things into our lives. What we attract depends on where and how we focus our attention, but we must believe that it’s already ours, or soon will be.
Be sure to start this list by stating whether if your Soulmate is single, straight/gay (yes, you must be that specific) and available for a healthy, loving, committed, long-term relationship (or marriage if that is what you want.) Also, be sure to include that he or she lives close enough to you, and/or is willing to relocate if necessary for the two of you to be together. It is very important that you do not get too attached to this list, but rather release it by saying to yourself, “I welcome this, or something better!”

Plainly, there are a number of factors that influence someone’s future success, starting with choosing the right parents in the right country. The children of affluent, educated parents are more likely themselves to be well-educated and ultimately employed successfully in good jobs. I take this to be an outgrowth of plain good luck. And good luck enters into people’s lives over and over again in many ways. Most truly distinguished individuals acknowledge the influence of luck in their lives.


Great article Neil! The biggest misconception about the law of attraction is people just think all you need to do is visualize and you will get what you want,we all have limiting beliefs which are chains holding us back from manifesting what we want,we’ve gotten these limiting beliefs when we were young from our parents,friends,relatives ,e.g if you’ve always been told by your parents “money doesnt grow on trees” and that becomes a deep rooted limiting belief ,its going to be hard to visualize and attract money into your life unless you get rid of the limiting beliefs, I discovered a method from a blog that showed me how to get rid of any limiting beliefs that you may have and started attracting what i wanted in just a few days ,here's the link if you want to learn how to do the same: instantlawofattraction.com/law-of-attraction-breakthrough/

The original creators of the law of attraction going back to the 1880s including Prentice Mulford,James Allen, Thomas Troward, William Walker Atkinson, Bruce MacLelland, Wallace Wattles, Napoleon Hill, Earl Nightingale, and W. Clement Stone promoted the belief that this is a universal law in which you attract only what you are thinking about. Modern LOA proponents such as Rhonda Byrne, Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, John Assaraf, Joe Vitale, The Hicks family, and many others have stated similar beliefs.
Hi SKA, The Law of Attraction creates through your thoughts, words and beliefs. If you read back over what you wrote and take all the negative thoughts and change them to positives, and read these regularly, you’ll soon see a shift in your vibration that will help you be with her. You can use this technique to change things with any person, even your best friend. You don’t just have to use these Law of Attraction techniques on a specific person you love.

12) We’re Not Perfect: The LOA is a “perfect law” and should result in a “perfect” life. We are told that no goal is too big if you can think it; there is no such thing as an unrealistic goal. From The Secret “You can think your way to the perfect state of health, the perfect body, the perfect weight, and eternal youth. You can bring it into being, through your consistent thinking of perfection.” Reality check -life is not perfect. It can be great, fantastic, amazing, incredible, even optimal. But perfect? Won’t happen. What’s the problem with this way of thinking? Why not expect perfection? Fantasizing and striving for perfect makes you feel better in the short term but actually reduces your chance of attaining your goals and results in more unhappiness and blaming. If you are only going to be satisfied with perfect results – perfect health, perfect body, perfect family, perfect marriage, perfect friendships, perfect kids, perfect house, perfect job, perfect life; you are in for a perfect disappointment. Research studies support this.
Hi Onique – You need to look over your thoughts, beliefs, emotions from the past to see why you created it in the past. You need to look at your current thoughts, beliefs and emotions to see why you are creating it now. There’s probably at least one thought/belief that has been repeated for 10 years and is still there. Changing your thoughts/beliefs allows your life to change.
A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”
The original creators of the law of attraction going back to the 1880s including Prentice Mulford,James Allen, Thomas Troward, William Walker Atkinson, Bruce MacLelland, Wallace Wattles, Napoleon Hill, Earl Nightingale, and W. Clement Stone promoted the belief that this is a universal law in which you attract only what you are thinking about. Modern LOA proponents such as Rhonda Byrne, Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, John Assaraf, Joe Vitale, The Hicks family, and many others have stated similar beliefs.
The concept of manifesting destiny, which rests on the Law of Attraction, is the idea that investing positive energy and belief in any desired outcome will allow a person to bring the outcome to fruition. In other words, you have the power to get what you want simply by believing in it. Sound a little crazy? Maybe. But if people swear by it, it's worth at least exploring, right?

Now, with this book, readers can learn how to use the Law of Attraction deliberately and integrate it into their daily life. By doing this, they will attract all they need to do, know, and have so they can get more of what they want and less of what they don't want. With its easy-to-follow 3-step formula (Identify Your Desire, Give Your Desire Attention, and Allowing), complete with tips, tools, exercises, and scripts, LAW OF ATTRACTION shows readers how to:
Most people don’t consider using the Law of Attraction to bring better health into their lives, but as you noticed in the results of the aging experiment, it’s actually a great tool for that purpose. Because the Law of Attraction works with thoughts and thoughts affect our physical reality, you may be attracting poor health into your life right now without even realizing it.
If you’re serious about growing yourself into becoming the kind of person that you want to attract, then I recommend that you cultivate a network of therapists, counselors, coaches, healing professionals, trusted friends and mentors whom you can count on for any variety of challenge that will arise.  Especially when the big stuff starts coming up, and it will!
"You cannot request or manifest a relationship as we desire. There is a beautiful component of wishing, manifesting, etc. that people often forget: free will. One cannot make someone do what they want them to do. ... To manifest a new relationship, one needs to create a list that can easily be fulfilled. A client of mine once made a list of the qualities she wanted in a man, but she listed each request as, 'I want a man who... and a man who... and a man who...' She ended up becoming involved with three different men with each of the qualities requested, not one man with all three qualities. Manifesting can be tricky," Rappaport warns.
The human mind is wired to do whatever it takes to avoid pain in the short term, and not necessarily in the long term. It’s part of our survival instinct. It’s built into our DNA, and is also the foundation of the fight or flight response. We are always looking to avoid pain in the short term. If we were trying to avoid pain in the long term, do you think the same person would keep smoking, keep over-eating, keep gambling, or even keep drinking alcohol? Of course they wouldn’t.
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