The Law of Attraction is among the most popular of the "Universal Laws".[3] Advocates of this mind-power paradigm generally combine cognitive reframing techniques with affirmations and creative visualization to replace limiting or self-destructive ("negative") thoughts with more empowered, adaptive ("positive") thoughts. A key component of the philosophy is that in order to effectively change one's negative thinking patterns, one must also "feel" (through creative visualization) that the desired changes have already occurred. This combination of positive thought and positive emotion is believed to allow one to "attract" positive experiences and opportunities by achieving resonance with the proposed energetic "Law".[4]
Enthusiasm. As former British prime minister Winston Churchill once said: “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” Despite all the bravado about being prepared to fail, the corporate world is very wary of failure today, however. Many people are unwilling to take major risks for fear of losing their jobs. As a result, genuinely “enthusiastic” people are fairly thin on the ground, which gives them a competitive advantage.
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Your second point is an interesting discussion. You are correct that in its infancy, psychology was criticized for claiming to be a scientific field and not living up to that assertion by performing quality research. I believe that this question has been put to rest as the rigors of publishing in psychology require randomized, double-blind, placebo controlled trials.
Thank you for your comments. Hard to be positive when talking about the LOA. It's focus on blaming is pervasive. I am a positive psychologist and have proposed a new way of looking at attraction called the Principle of Attraction. As a Principle, like tends to attract like. Positive thoughts, feelings, actions, and words often attracts positivity...but not always. It's not a law, it's a principle, based on positive and social psychology.
Consciously shifting your thoughts is definitely the easier path, but when we first start working with LOA, this can be hard to do because our current belief system of having to take action, hustle and MAKE things happen, is still quite strong and we just can’t buy into this fully even if it resonates with us, and we know there is some truth to this method of bringing what we want into our life. Visualizing is a good tool for uncovering resistance, which is essentially all the reasons we tell ourselves we can’t have what we want, and getting into a good feeling space. One of the most important things is not to worry about getting super-specific. Don’t worry about figuring our what this person looks like, exactly what he is like, just try to get into the feelings. Trying to get too specific with the type of person can trigger a lot of resistance, and may even actually clog up the channels of receiving because you may get too attached to this person having to be a very specific way.
Just like you I have been reading and searching as much information related to this topic since I first heard of it years ago. I have fulfilled most if my goals and dreams. But guess what!! None of them are related to yachts, eating caviar, sipping champagne or waiting for a private jet to fly me to my private island. None of those are goals in my life and all of them except for the private island and the yet I have experienced and enjoyed without even having to be a tycoon.

It’s quite clear then that in order to succeed in life at any endeavor, we need to set specific goals. But, not only do they have to be specific, they have to be S.M.A.R.T.E.R. goals — goals that are specific, meaningful, achievable, relevant, and time-based. Those goals also need to be constantly evaluated and the plans re-adjusted in order to attain them.


One of the most important elements of using visualization tools is to find the methods that best maintain constant focus on your objectives. Some people find different forms of visualization more powerful than others, so we’ll help you find the visualization styles that infuse you with the most intense sense of confidence and optimism. In addition, you’ll learn how to combine your new visualization tools with more positive ways of interacting with others, helping you to live and behave like you have already accomplished your goals.

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No matter what we attract, it is always there to help us, so you want to think about this scenario and what feelings came up around it, and that can clue you in to how it is useful for your journey of attracting a relationship. As for your friend, I am not sure what topic of conversation was involved as far as you feeling like you can’t be yourself around her, but as some general advice, anytime we feel like we can’t be ourselves in a certain situation or around a certain person, it is a problem plain and simple that must be examined. Ultimately, it comes down to determining whether your reluctance to be yourself is more based in your own fears, and your friend would more than likely accept you, or if your friend is someone who is very judgmental or wouldn’t be able to accept you for who are because of strong beliefs she holds about certain things.
Living “as if” can be a powerful way to help yourself to manifest love. What this means is that you should try to live every day not as though you’re looking for love but as though you’ve already found it! Embrace self-love and dress as you would if you were spending time with your partner. Try to make space for them in your home. See yourself as a person with a loving soulmate and a bright future, and make plans accordingly.
Gabriel…I have been going for energy healing sessions since years now and have been working on myself…..I must admit that I still have apprehensions on manifesting my soulmate desires and often wallow on self pity despite all the inner work I have been doing…..however, reading this article today has completely opened my heart and mind and given me so much hope and positivity…..you are absolutely right in quoting that our soulmates are within us all along…..I would like to express my heartfelt gratitude to you for writing such an articulate, poignant and powerful article for us…..thank you so much for opening our heart to love and creating our own reality……thank you for telling us that IT IS possible and IT exists for each of us…….much love
I am so glad you found the post helpful. That is great that your faith in the ability to consciously create our reality is growing. As it does, you will see more and more ‘proof’, which will just reinforce that, setting of a wonderful cycle. Just always remember to be patient, and make your core focus feeling good about the work you are doing. Find content that resonates with you, and really focus on learning from those sources. That encounter with that person definitely shows you are moving towards what you want. Being able to truly be ourselves will make the process of attracting a relationship so much easier, you have no idea.
I really enjoy reading your posts and learning about opening up to deep and fulfilling love. After heart shattering loss over the course of the last two years I am now in the process of putting myself back together again. It’s still pretty messy but I really want to learn to love myself and be the best version of myself, for me and for my soulmate who I know is out there waiting for me to be ready for forever.
Thank you for that piece of advice-should I remain in a constant state of “as if” with no attentiin on what is? Or should I focus in what I want, relax, and accept what is? Normally I focus in meditation on my intentions, relax, and allow my manifestations to occur—but, normally I am also not as Concerned about what I want to manifest. Should I be doing it differently?
The financial newspaper Investors Business Daily (IBD) asked these same questions a few years ago and started a multi-year search for the answer. They studied industry leaders, investors and entrepreneurs to understand the traits they all had in common that contributed to their success. Reproduced here is their list of 10 Secrets to Success along with my commentary on each no-so-secret, ‘secret’.
Hi Elizabeth, I’ve read your book (loved it!) and the “rules” for those of us who want to manifest an ex, seem a little more demanding and complex… What if your ex wants nothing to do with you, or appears not to want to? What if they are telling everyone they are moving on and happier without you and are going toward greener pastures and they are open to meeting someone new? Secondly, how does one visualize happiness when still hurting, and how does one visualize good things and “let it go” when the memory of the breakup is still recent and fresh. Any tips on how to switch off emotional pain and memories, and just concentrate on the good? I just feel that manifesting an ex back is a great deal more challenging (and yes it is him I really want) because of the history there which simply can’t be erased or forgotten….
The human mind is wired to do whatever it takes to avoid pain in the short term, and not necessarily in the long term. It’s part of our survival instinct. It’s built into our DNA, and is also the foundation of the fight or flight response. We are always looking to avoid pain in the short term. If we were trying to avoid pain in the long term, do you think the same person would keep smoking, keep over-eating, keep gambling, or even keep drinking alcohol? Of course they wouldn’t.
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