After my first book was published in 2000, I spent two and a half years writing a novel. But it never felt right. I didn't even name it—it was the poor, misshapen beast child I kept hidden under my bed. Then I showed it to my agent. "None of the things you do well are in evidence here," she said. I was devastated, then relieved: I had failed, and now I could stop. If you don't feel a shiver of excitement or fear, if there's no emotional risk involved, let it go. You can't discount how hard it will be to leave your bad marriage or stop writing your bad book, but if you're unhappy, nothing can get better as long as the status quo stays the status quo.
Thank you for that piece of advice-should I remain in a constant state of “as if” with no attentiin on what is? Or should I focus in what I want, relax, and accept what is? Normally I focus in meditation on my intentions, relax, and allow my manifestations to occur—but, normally I am also not as Concerned about what I want to manifest. Should I be doing it differently?
I am so glad you found the post helpful. That is great that your faith in the ability to consciously create our reality is growing. As it does, you will see more and more ‘proof’, which will just reinforce that, setting of a wonderful cycle. Just always remember to be patient, and make your core focus feeling good about the work you are doing. Find content that resonates with you, and really focus on learning from those sources. That encounter with that person definitely shows you are moving towards what you want. Being able to truly be ourselves will make the process of attracting a relationship so much easier, you have no idea.
I really need your help.. The thing is I like one guy very much. Since the first time I saw him, I felt the connection I have never felt with someone else before.. This time I am sure he is the One. I see myself marrying him one day… even when I feel bad, I still have that picture in my head of me saying “I do” to him… He has all the qualities that I wanted in a guy.. He even is born on the same day as me.. Since I saw him looking at me, I felt he liked me… however, I’m a type of person who doubts a lot. like really a lot… Long story short, on December last year I added him on facebook and he messaged me immediately. It really showed that he was interested in me. An we had so much in common that I couldn’t even believe this can be true… so we were chatting on and off. we both are shy… and i remember that I would message him of desperation sometimes.. I messaged him in February.. we had a nice conversation, but for some reason I started doubting and crying… I was broke… then I found (again) the LOA, your articles were very inspiring..I was feeling quite good and would sometimes get on a level that I didn’t need him to make me happy. Then a miracle happened, after a month of our conversation, he asked me out. It was an amazing date. He was so happy then.. he even blushed a few times.. then, after a week he asked me out again. and again it was a wonderful time that we shared.. and after the date he said this: “there will be infinity of dates like this”, and the look in his eyes and.. and his smile said even more – he was very very happy when with me. He was glowing. However… i for some reason shied away and didn’t even message him after a date.. the next day I saw him and he was very said when I said hello to him. I could see the sadness in his eyes… then I felt guilty… i started doubting… and things got worse… I tried to fix the situation after more than a month… I asked him out myself. but he couldn’t go.. and then it was a breakdown for me… it was an awful period… I was very negative.. and i saw hi groupmate being with him at university all the time… it took me a couple of months to feel better… at the end of June I was feeling good. I was relaxed… And then I got a message from him. It was the nicest compliment I had ever received..I will not go into details, but I was on and off with my emotions… I thought that in September (because we study at the same university, except for he is a year older than me) things will be very good.. but they are not… we only say hello to each other… and most of the time ignore each other like we don’t exist… his groupmate is still being flirty with him and I don’t know what to do. It’s his last year in university.. I don’t have much time and this puts even more stress on me.. One of my friends keeps telling me that if he cared he would have done something by now… it hurts, because… because I had a chance to have him in my life but because of my fears and doubts I messed it all up.. Another friend says that I have to do something.. that I have to message him… but I don’t feel good now.. I’m not inspired and I don’t know if I ever will.. I simply love this person with my whole heart, and he is amazing… and I’m scared to lose him.. Any advice how I could calm down and go in the direction of my desire? because I feel like i’m going the opposite way. Maybe someone is in a similiar situation as me?
Here’s the thing: you can only attract that to which you are a match, and if you are hiding who you really are, or are trying to construct some ‘perfect’ version of yourself you believe makes you more attractive as a potential mate, you will only attract other people who are putting up these same facades. You will never make any true connections—you’re being inauthentic and everyone you meet is being inauthentic, and eventually it will all come to the surface in some way. One of the reasons people struggle to meet the right person is because everyone is just walking around, faking it.
It's curious that people who believe in a LOA are critical of those who don't and believe them to be close-minded. I have presented a lot of new data such as the erroneous science and the data showing that acting as though you had already accomplished your goals was detrimental to you doing so. Yet, LOA proponents do not look at this with an open mind and reconsider their belief system. In this way LOA is akin to a faith-based religion, except that religious beliefs can't be disproven.
The fact that we build evidence to support our beliefs is not evidence that a law of attraction exists. Why do innocent babies attract negativity that causes them to be in the ICU with fatal illnesses? Why do happy children get hit by cars or murdered by terrorists? Why do people who cheat and lie and abuse others, sometimes prosper and become leaders in society? If we are using anecdotal evidence to support claims, I will have plenty of examples.
It is not immediately obvious what it means to be successful in life. The term is used generally to describe a professional success, that is, a signal achievement at work, indicated in part, but only in part, by having made a lot of money. Sometimes success means preeminence in politics or science or sports in a manner that does not necessarily imply financial attainment, but rather public recognition. Those who become famous in the arts or by virtue of charitable acts or acts of bravery are thought to be successful also. Others speak perhaps less conventionally of successfully raising children and grandchildren. That is not what most people mean by success, but a good case can be made for that achievement being especially important; and different societies have regarded the work of bringing up the next generation as critically important.
Hi. I was in a relationship with a guy for awhile but we split in 2008. Since then he has had a girlfriend and I think they still live together. I have dated since then but have been unsuccessful in finding that combustible chemistry that I had with him, with someone else. We would always reconnect on and off throughout the entire time we were broken up until last year. We both sort of faded and haven’t been in touch for about a year and 6 months now. We may not be meant to be together but I miss the initial friendship we had prior to us being in a relationship; we were so close and complimented each other well. I have let go, forgiven and accepted what was and what is but recently felt intense energy wanting him back in my life and it’s never been this intense since the first couple of months following the breakup. I have been single ever since, but have gone on plenty dates as I am never lacking suitors. I am no longer in love with him but I do still love him and miss his presence, chemistry, companionship and energy. I have accomplished many goals that I’ve set but there’s this void that has yet to be satisfied, which I’m afraid can only be fulfilled by him or someone/something similar. I’ve read that letting go will attract, which I have done but he hasn’t completely come back. I never pressure, I play it cool and may even come off passive. When we reconnect, I hide my hurt and heart and don’t mention getting back together because I feel we’re not at the point yet. I was his first girlfriend and he was my first boyfriend as well. I’ve given it space, time and room to breath as I trust in divine intervention as well as universal laws. I’ve thought happy and positive thoughts, I’ve even tried to create visuals in my mind but nada. What could be going on? I miss him a lot.
Additional to reading your very helpful posts I used to do the Soul Call Guided Meditation every now and then like you suggested in this post. It helped me keep my heart open and believing in the magic of everything that can be, it made me downright excited and tingly in my heart about the future. Unfortunately it is not available anymore so I wanted to ask if it is somehow possible to have access to it again? I tried a lot of other meditations but never got even a similar feeling afterwards.
This freaks people out because they believe feeling happier now as a single person will cancel their 'order' with the Universe for a relationship. But don't worry... it doesn't work like that. Wanting and needing something to happen is not what brings it to you... trust me. Feeling the feelings that lie behind what you want now, and detaching from the idea this thing needs to happen for you to be happy, is what does -- much more quickly and easily.
Just like the good old tracks that the sled follows down the mountain. And so we tell the same old story, over and over, about why we have our childhood wounds, and about how bad our previous relationship was, how we got dumped, how we’re not being loved the way we want to be, how unequal this relationship is, how we have these abandonment issues, how they cheated on us, how we’re too old to find love, too fat, too skinny, too white, too black, too gay, too straight, too poor, too rich, too unstable, too unreliable, afraid of commitment, too demanding… Blah, blah, blah. PLEASE STOP! The more you tell the same old story, the more you’re perpetuating it in your experience and the more you’re blocking love from coming into your life. Why? Because you keep focusing on it.
Your future can be anything that you choose it to be. There is a limitless number of possibilities for you to step into, just as there is a limitless versions of you and a limitless versions of everyone else in your life. Everyone takes a role according to the reality you create. If you create a reality with him in it, he will be in it. If you create a reality without him, he won’t be in it. It’s all about you and what you create.
While you’ve likely asked yourself this question before, and more than likely you’ve read or heard about it somewhere, the discussion still beckons us. So what is the secret to success in life? How can we achieve our wildest dreams over time without getting discouraged? How can we match our actions with our words, follow through, and persist until we achieve wild success?