I’ve been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now and we live together. In the beginning of October things were bad, he forced me to move out thinking it would help things, which surprisingly it did. I thought this would only make things worse, I was constantly worried he would cheat on me, go behind my back, and betray me; like he has before. We were still together, just not living together. A week later after we spent some time talking and working through things, I moved back in. Ever since then over the few weeks things have been great, he’s treated me amazing, however I still have a fear of, “what if he is treating me like this but is potentially going behind my back?” A few days ago he had a missed call from a number with a area code of where his ex lives, I do not know if it was her, a telemarketer, or just a random wrong number. But it is has worried me over the past few days. I also worry when I’m at work and he’s at home, what he’s doing. I try so hard to imagine us happy and trying to believe in everything he says to me is true and sincere. I just have major trust issues. I care for him an immense amount and would do anything for him, I love him very much. However, I do believe that I would be okay with out him.. eventually in time. I do not want this to happen, but you said you have to imagine yourself being able to let go of that person. He is for sure the person I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I never want to lose him. What I am confused about is, if I am using the Law of Attraction to attract him more into my life, what if he is using the Law of Attraction to attract a different person in his life, such as his ex, instead of me. Which situation with manifest? He is not the type of person to ever think about these, he doesn’t even know what the Law of Attraction is, but I believe he could subconsciously be doing this and not even knowing it. Again, I think way too in depth about things and sometimes just make it worse for myself.
Hi Geoff! Thank you for your reply. I do understand the chapter is about getting an ex back. However, what I meant to ask is whether the same rule applies if the person you want to manifest a relationship with is someone you haven’t previously dated. You see I talk to him everyday and he often tends to talk about the girl he is with or unknowingly tells me how I mean a lot to him but only as a friend. And every time that happens I just can’t stop negative thoughts of fear and doubt cropping up in my mind, thus making it difficult for me to let go. So I want to know if I should maintain some distance, perhaps talk less often. The only issue here is that there isn’t really any problem between us. He knows I love him and we kind of sorted it out a couple of months back and have continued to be best friends. I don’t quite have a reason to suddenly cut down on talking to him and I am sure if I do that he would want to know why.
For one of a million reasons, we feel like we can’t be ourselves. We long to be. We just want to move through the world as we truly are, without the masks. This is especially true when it comes to relationships. If you asked someone to make a list of what he wanted in a partner, I imagine ‘loving me for who I am’ would near the top of anyone’s list, or at least anyone who wants a real, authentic relationship.
As for manifestations that involve another person, you probably don’t want to put too much focus on that because we can’t create in another person’s reality. No matter what we do with our energy, it can’t ‘translate’ to someone else and make them do anything. Now, this isn’t to say that you can’t ever get back together with this person, as that may possibly be the best representation of the energy and feelings that you are trying to attract into your life–remember that no matter what we want, we are always after a feeling. What also happens sometimes is when we make changes in our own energy, we line up with different ‘versions’ of people, even if they have fundamentally stayed the same, and this can make it easier to get along with them,etc…
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We can't always control our circumstances, but we can control our responses to them. In this vein, the Law of Attraction can provide the optimism and proactive attitude that's associated with resilience in difficult situations, but must not be used as a tool of self-blame. Our responses to the challenges we face can make us stronger in the end, and the Law of Attraction can be used for that end, but should not be applied negatively, or it can be more destructive than helpful.
And then, sometimes I think that the current relationship will eventually end in some way if the person working consciously with LOA makes such dramatic shifts that she and her current partner are just too far away from each other vibrationally. This could definitely happen without your ending it specifically–the other person could end it, it could be mutual and amicable, something could happen that creates a large rift and you both can’t see a way to move past it, or you may decide to end it and it won’t feel as scary as it may currently because you just know it is the right thing to do. I don’t think being unhappy with a relationship as it currently is now is an absolute sign that it is not right..ultimately, it depends on so many individual factors, and as the person doing the LOA work gets deeper and more in touch with what is happening, she will have a sense of what she really wants and how she thinks it will play out. It does take a degree of honesty that can feel a bit uncomfortable, but necessary.
7) No Compassion: Don’t get involved with anything negative like charity or helping the needy. This will attract more negativity and poverty. Wallace Wattles, a LOA founder wrote, “Do not talk about poverty; do not investigate it, or concern yourself with it. Do not spend your time in charitable work, or charity movements, all charity only tends to perpetuate the wretchedness it aims to eradicate.” and “Give your attention wholly to riches; ignore poverty.” Rhonda Byrne in The Secret takes this a step further, “If you see people who are overweight, do not observe them…If you think or talk about diseases, you will become sick. What you think or surround yourself with – good or bad, is what you will bring upon yourself.” If you believe in a LOA avoid any of the “helping or health” professions such as physician, nurse, hospital worker, clergy, psychologist, police officer, paramedic, etc. Avoid professions in which you deal with poor people such as accountant, mortgage broker, banker, lawyer, etc. While research shows that charitable work, empathy and volunteering is beneficial to both the giver and receiver, avoid these things if you believe in a LOA.
We tend to think of gratitude as a spontaneous emotion, something that just happens to us in moments of triumph or success. In reality, though, gratitude is something we develop.And just like all the other not-so-secret secrets on this list, it is something we choose, something we make a wide-eyed, premeditated, self-determined decision to experience.