To add, he has been saying he has “something in the works” and I asked what he meant and he said it was a surprise but that is has to do with he and I and our love and that he knows it’s going to make me extremely happy. He never does anything for me, or buys me things so I’m having a hard time trying to imagine what this could be. I’m deep down hoping that maybe he could be talking about proposing to me. He said I should expect this “surprise” in one to two weeks. Is it possible for me to use the Law of Attraction to make this actually be a proposal?
In the short term, the cigarette smoker cannot bear to quit because the pain of withdrawal and detox from cigarettes is just too high to bear. Similarly, the cravings that a person might feel who’s overweight and needs to be dieting, which eventually turn into physical withdrawals from things like fat, sugar, and carbohydrates, bring on an intense amount of pain in the short term.
We live in a magical universe that can bring you exactly what you desire in the most amazing and even unbelievable ways. Getting caught up in the how can actually impede the law of attraction. If you are trying to control the how, you are likely getting in the way and making it more difficult than it has to be. Instead, let go of any ideas about how it has to happen and allow the universe to do its magic.
The first article about this was in Psychology Today - “Throw Away Your Vision Board.” After a quarter million hits and much hate mail, I wanted to make sure that I had a thorough LOA understanding so I read every book from the originators of the law in the late 1800s and became a certified “Advanced Practitioner of the Law of Attraction” by one of the authors of "The Secret." I then wrote “Throw Away Your Vision Board 2.” This time the feedback was a little more positive. I recently published the book, Throw Away Your Vision Board: The Truth About the Law of Attraction. This article will summarize 14 reasons why there is no LOA.  
If you’re looking to learn how to manifest love fast, the key message you need to internalize is that you have to start looking for love with real intention. What this means is that you must learn how to align yourself with a vibrational frequency that can attract love rather than further disappointment, and that you need to develop a vivid, clear sense of what you’re actually trying to do when you aim to manifest love.

The journey of welcoming your Soulmate is a journey towards your authentic nature.  It’s not a journey of finding somebody who is going to love you, make you happy, or give you something that you don’t already have, but rather it is a journey of growing yourself and your own capacity to love yourself first before you can love others or welcome and recognize their love.  It is about becoming more yourself, doing all the necessary clearing out, and embracing all the darker, subtle, shadow aspects of yourself that you’ve been unwilling to look at.


Positive thoughts lead to positive attitudes and positive behaviors. Positive people have more friends, better relationships, better jobs, get more promotions, are healthier and have improved immune systems. This is positive psychology, not a metaphysical phenomenon. It forms the basis of a Principle of Attraction in which Like tends to and often attracts Like...but not always.
2) I was told by some people who also follow the LOA methods that manifesting someone specific was not advisable because it was going against the wishes of that said person if that’s not what they wanted anymore. He’s made it very clear that it is not what he wants at all. Am I wrong for wanting the love of my life back and just be given a genuine chance to see if things could work again?
"You cannot request or manifest a relationship as we desire. There is a beautiful component of wishing, manifesting, etc. that people often forget: free will. One cannot make someone do what they want them to do. ... To manifest a new relationship, one needs to create a list that can easily be fulfilled. A client of mine once made a list of the qualities she wanted in a man, but she listed each request as, 'I want a man who... and a man who... and a man who...' She ended up becoming involved with three different men with each of the qualities requested, not one man with all three qualities. Manifesting can be tricky," Rappaport warns.
Enthusiasm. As former British prime minister Winston Churchill once said: “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” Despite all the bravado about being prepared to fail, the corporate world is very wary of failure today, however. Many people are unwilling to take major risks for fear of losing their jobs. As a result, genuinely “enthusiastic” people are fairly thin on the ground, which gives them a competitive advantage.
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As a mind-reader, you should try to ATTRACT a different job, since in no way do I have any anger towards anyone with erroneous beliefs. I do feel sorry for you, but this is not anger. This is a free country and free society and you are free to believe anything you desire and free to waste your time as you see fit. You can smoke cigarettes as well. They will harm you and that is your choice. Same as a belief in a LOA.

Abundant life teachings, that God is a good God who wants to bless people spiritually, physically, and economically, were championed by Oral Roberts in the United States after World War II,[5] with his faith healing ministry having the most effect.[6] These teachings came at a time when many equated poverty with spirituality, and sickness with God’s discipline and punishment.[7] He included the term Abundant Life in the name of many parts of his ministries, such as The Abundant Life television program,[8] the Abundant Life magazine,[9][10][11] the Abundant Life Prayer Group (ALPG), and the Abundant Life Building used as his world headquarters.[12][13]
4)Transcend Your Childhood Drama (pgs. 199-211): This informative section lists essential information on steps anyone can take to make peace with their childhood in order to more joyfully help in transforming their adult self. I really appreciate (and found it healing) how the authors mention in one of their steps is to accept the truth that it was never about you (pg. 202-203). All the steps listed are very helpful, but the steps that resonated the most with me are the steps of rewiring your mental direction, belief relief, and doing it now.

You are welcome. You seem to already have that deeper knowing..now it is all about building that trust and working a bit with your mind to be more accepting of the beliefs and new reality you are looking to create. Everything that happens contains a lesson to strengthening our manifesting so whatever happened with that guy will be valuable in evaluating what is going on inside and moving forward with greater clarity.

The original creators of the law of attraction going back to the 1880s including Prentice Mulford,James Allen, Thomas Troward, William Walker Atkinson, Bruce MacLelland, Wallace Wattles, Napoleon Hill, Earl Nightingale, and W. Clement Stone promoted the belief that this is a universal law in which you attract only what you are thinking about. Modern LOA proponents such as Rhonda Byrne, Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, John Assaraf, Joe Vitale, The Hicks family, and many others have stated similar beliefs.
The union of all people is only a mechanism for perfecting the process of soul-consciousness. Therefore, the process of attracting a soulmate, as well as the process of keeping the soul you already live with, but are experiencing a crisis, depends on how much you accept communion as a school of awareness and learning, the transformation of oneself.
Français: utiliser la loi de l'attraction, Italiano: Usare la Legge dell'Attrazione, Deutsch: Anziehungskraft nutzen, Português: Usar a Lei da Atração, Nederlands: De Wet van Aantrekking gebruiken, Русский: использовать закон притяжения, 中文: 运用吸引力法则, Bahasa Indonesia: Menerapkan Hukum Tarik Menarik, العربية: استخدام قانون الجذب الكوني, Tiếng Việt: Sử dụng luật hấp dẫn, ไทย: ใช้กฎแห่งแรงดึงดูด, 한국어: 끌어당김의 법칙 활용하는 법, 日本語: 引き寄せの法則を使う, Türkçe: Çekim Yasası Nasıl Uygulanır, Español: aplicar la ley de la atracción
1) I have had a rather bad break-up with my boyfriend. All in all, he wants to move on completely and says that while he loved me and cared about me at the time of the break-up he simply wasn’t happy anymore and wants to move on to a new city, life etc… We have so financial dealings together but he says he no longer wants to worry about it because keeping in touch about cash isn’t healthy and we both need to move on. He has made it clear that there is no way he would get back into a relationship with me. And of course, after being told this I wrote him an angry email giving him a piece of my mind. While I love him more than life itself and visualize us being together again I must say that I find it very difficult to imagine us together, based on the way he seems to feel (or not feel…) about me. How do I let go of thinking of the outcome when all I can do is think about him and that perhaps he will meet someone else soon, or already has etc….
This entire reality is your creation. Feel good about that. Feel grateful for the richness of your world. And then begin creating the reality you truly want by making decisions and holding intentions. Think about what you desire, and withdraw your thoughts from what you don’t want. The most natural, easiest way to do this is to pay attention to your emotions. Thinking about your desires feels good, and thinking about what you don’t want makes you feel bad. When you notice yourself feeling bad, you’ve caught yourself thinking about something you don’t want. Turn your focus back towards what you do want, and your emotional state will improve rapidly. As you do this repeatedly, you’ll begin to see your physical reality shift too, first in subtle ways and then in bigger leaps.
4. With regard to whatever worries you, not only accept the worst thing that could happen, but make it a point to quantify what the worst thing could be. Very seldom will the worst consequence be anywhere near as bad as a cloud of “undefined consequences.” My father would tell me early on, when I was struggling and losing my shirt trying to get Parsons Technology going, “Well, Robert, if it doesn’t work, they can’t eat you.”
Yes, I am familiar with that phrase, although not sure how it applies to this situation. I am the source and you would like me to consider myself? I do not have an employer. Psychology Today provides a forum for articles and discussions. They do not hire me or pay me. They are not the source of this information. I take full responsibility for the content.
Thank you so much for your book. I have read it and used the techniques which have worked so far. I have a few questions…my ex and I broke up back in April. We were in a long distance relationship for about 6-7 months. Really close, basically my best friend. The distance was too hard and she couldn’t do it anymore. We still talked every now and then, flirting and reminiscing and catching up. But here recently she told me she has a boyfriend now. Then about a month later she asks me to go to a concert with her and that I can stay with her at her house, which was something I manifested but she still has a boyfriend. I’ve followed the steps of giving her the cold shoulder and making her miss me but how can I do that when she has a boyfriend? My next next question has to do with thinking. I read my scripted visualization and look at my vision board twice a day. It’s really uplifting. I send out heart energy which has worked because the other day she texted me a picture of a few things I’ve given her and that she could never throw them away. My question is, can thinking about her and all the good times we had and thinking about our future together, can that delay results and should I just stick to doing the scripted visualizations and sending heart energy? Thank you so much!

Banish guilt and feelings of self-doubt from your life and your internal world forever. No negotiation. I did it, and it worked like a dream. You have no more right or need to feel any more guilty than a butterfly. And like a butterfly, you are free to fly and celebrate your uniqueness today. You are ready for a life of awesome results and celebration. But are you ready to give yourself permission to do this yet?
No 8: Find someone you can talk to. It’s lonely at the top, especially if you're at the top of a one-person business. Find someone – not an employee or spouse – with whom you can share business problems, ask advice, bounce off ideas. An experienced business colleague will help you keep your balance during the roller-coaster ride of setbacks and successes.   
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and I am so glad you liked the post. I think a lot of people have that fear, so you are certainly not alone in that. One of the things that has helped me most with that is remembering how ‘challenging’ the human experience is, and knowing we all have our ‘stuff’ that we hold inside, bad things that have happened to us, etc.. For the most part, I think lots of people actually want to talk about these things and not feel like they are the only one struggling. Intellectually we know that isn’t true, but how we feel is often very different. When we think about it this way, sharing our own ‘stuff’ feels less scary. And, as you work on your attraction, you will naturally begin to meet up with people who you do feel comfortable with, and will not pull away when things get closer.

As for losing faith in the Universe, that phrasing suggests you are applying ‘humanness’ to this force, and looking at it as something that makes decisions, rewards people,etc… It implies you are waiting for it to give you something. It is much more mechanical than that..it is neutral. It can only reflect back to us our predominant beliefs and feelings–it can’t deliver something because we are a good person, or are trying really hard,etc.. Think of it as a computer–input,output.


Banish guilt and feelings of self-doubt from your life and your internal world forever. No negotiation. I did it, and it worked like a dream. You have no more right or need to feel any more guilty than a butterfly. And like a butterfly, you are free to fly and celebrate your uniqueness today. You are ready for a life of awesome results and celebration. But are you ready to give yourself permission to do this yet?
But it’s only when you are okay with not being with them, that you open the path for the Law of Attraction to attract your specific person to you. Until you’re okay with not being with him/her, a part of you is resisting and making it impossible for you to have what you want. This means, according to the Law of Attraction, that until you’re okay with possibly losing him/her, it will be difficult for you to have the relationship you want with him/her. You have to be okay with not having him/her.

Is there any truth to “The Secret”? Is there any validity to the law of attraction? As with most other popular ideas, “The Secret” has a nugget of truth that is expanded to unbiblical and illogical extremes. For example, a thesis of the law of attraction is that our physical health is determined by our thoughts and feelings. It has been medically proven that stress and worry are harmful to the body, while joy and peace actually aid in the healing process. The Bible agrees, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22). “A cheerful look brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones” (Proverbs 15:30). As David was struggling with the guilt of his unconfessed, evil actions, he declared, “When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long” (Psalm 32:3). Our thoughts and feelings do have an impact on our physical well-being. However, this is due to how God designed our bodies…not because of our connection with a universal energy force and our negativity or positivity attracting negative or positive physical symptoms.
I am trained as a "hard science" PhD in Pharmacology and do understand scientific method. The LOA is not based on scientific method and the erroneous conclusions in metaphysics are based on incorrect scientific assumptions. These assumptions may have seemed reasonable in the 1800s that there was no air around us, only ether and that thoughts only transmit through ether. Perhaps this assumption is correct, however we are not surrounded by ether.
- If I don't have much respect for my body and health or I'm stuck in the "fat" mentality, then I won't stick to a good diet. The key isn't to go from 0 to 100 (from eating fast food regularly to becoming vegetarian, for example). The mind cannot make such a huge switch in a short amount of time due to all the patterns one has developed over the years. Again, psychology 101. So simple yet so many get it wrong. There is no "perfect" diet. But when you have enough respect for your body, you would definitely have the motivation to stick to transition (
We tend to think of gratitude as a spontaneous emotion, something that just happens to us in moments of triumph or success. In reality, though, gratitude is something we develop.And just like all the other not-so-secret secrets on this list, it is something we choose, something we make a wide-eyed, premeditated, self-determined decision to experience.
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