No. 11: Finally and most importantly, believe in what you do. When things get tough, as they inevitably do, it helps to be doing something you feel is important.  What keeps me going is the belief that what I do makes a difference to others, and I’m fortunate that so many readers let me know I’ve made a difference to them. And that, in the end, may be the biggest reason of all for why I’m still here.
Now, if you want a really detailed guide on attracting love, have a look at The Law Of Attraction program called Origins. It includes a book called Magnetic Love Mysteries Revealed: The 9 Simple Steps To Attracting Your Perfect Romantic Partner. It teaches how to quickly and easily harness The Law of Attraction to find the one without feeling desperate or alone.
If you read LOA websites and posts, you’d guess that it is might be over 90% effective - everybody seems to be achieving their goals this way. Talk to experts who deal with the general public trying to use a LOA, there’s a completely different story. The failure rate is huge! In fact, LOA expert John Assaraf estimated that the success rate is about 0.1%!! We believe this number to be correct.
Is there any truth to “The Secret”? Is there any validity to the law of attraction? As with most other popular ideas, “The Secret” has a nugget of truth that is expanded to unbiblical and illogical extremes. For example, a thesis of the law of attraction is that our physical health is determined by our thoughts and feelings. It has been medically proven that stress and worry are harmful to the body, while joy and peace actually aid in the healing process. The Bible agrees, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22). “A cheerful look brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones” (Proverbs 15:30). As David was struggling with the guilt of his unconfessed, evil actions, he declared, “When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long” (Psalm 32:3). Our thoughts and feelings do have an impact on our physical well-being. However, this is due to how God designed our bodies…not because of our connection with a universal energy force and our negativity or positivity attracting negative or positive physical symptoms.
When we talk about true love, commitment is more than just monogamy. It represents that your partner cares for you as much as you do. He/she wants to be with you for the rest of his life. Commitment believes that no matter what, you both are there for each other even in worst situations. This is one factor that should be equally shared by both the partners.

Instead I have been able to approach life in a different way. Learning to be thankful for the things I keep om receiving everyday, such as: The love of my kids, my friends, the overall experience in my journey and of course I have been throught bad ones and good ones. But all of those experience are an invaluable treasure to me. So dont assume everyone wants to attract the things you mentioned before.
I am so grateful I manifested this site/your book. I just read Manifesting Love and beginning first thing tomorrow I am going to intensely start the process of visualizing this guy into my life. The problem is he is a friend and although he talks to me and is friendly he has yet to make a move. I recently found out that he (31) may be dating a 23 year old girl who still lives at home with her parents. I know this girl and I would never want to get in the way of another’s relationship but I have such strong feelings for him. I just want him to start liking me. I also suffer from anxiety and depression which makes the negative feelings even more abundant. Do you have any tips for me? I really want to get this guy in the next 6 weeks. I appreciate any help I can get.

In the New Thought philosophy, the Law of Attraction is the belief that by focusing on positive or negative thoughts, people can bring positive or negative experiences into their life.[1][2] The belief is based on the idea that people and their thoughts are both made from "pure energy", and that through the process of "like energy attracting like energy" a person can improve their own health, wealth, and personal relationships.

"One can work toward manifesting positive outcomes; however, there are always these statements: 'I want this but not that. I want this and that, and I want this, but if I cannot have this, I will settle for this.' These types of thoughts bring forth convoluted requests and results. Using the modifiers 'not, but, and, as well as, either/or' muck things up. The energies that guide us and assist us take the request that was uttered or written and manifest things literally (including those words). It just happens that way. I tell people to only state or write down what they want and to leave out the things they do not want. The use of modifiers often provides mixed results, which may not be what someone wants," Rappaport claims.
But, once you start seeing your external experience is a mirror of what you feel and believe, you will make the amazing realization that changing your internal world will change what you bring into your life. If you don’t believe you have to settle or compromise, you won’t. If you believe you will find the right person, you will. If you know you don’t have to end up alone, you won’t. Sound too simplistic? Is the skeptical part of you being activated and resisting this? Are you thinking of all your experiences that have ‘proved’ your current set of beliefs, beyond a shadow of a doubt, and saying to yourself that I don’t know what the hell I am talking about? But, this is really all there is to it.Life is so much easier than we make it out to be.
People living today have the same access to the original creators' texts online as people in 1880 had in printed books. It's exactly the same material. You're essentially arguing against yourself because asserting that no one knows for sure about it would have to apply to the people in 1880 as well. Your argument is an appeal to ignorance, which is a logical fallacy. The text in the creators' books is precisely the data he's referring to, a intellectual creation that has absolutely no scientific basis.
Some people begin to see things happen immediately, while others take a little more time. The key here is patience and persistence. As soon as doubt or fear start to creep back in, return to Step 2 and address it. If you have lost touch with your clear intention, revert to Step 1. If your belief in the Law of Attraction lags, go back to Step 3. If all else fails, repeat Step 4 every day until it becomes a reality!

Step 4 is important for two reasons. The first is that it aligns you with your desires. The entire concept behind the Law of Attraction is that like attracts like. When you take action as if you’ve already gotten what you desire, you are sending a huge, loud and clear message to the universe that you’re serious. Actions speak louder than words, right?
Hi SKA, The Law of Attraction creates through your thoughts, words and beliefs. If you read back over what you wrote and take all the negative thoughts and change them to positives, and read these regularly, you’ll soon see a shift in your vibration that will help you be with her. You can use this technique to change things with any person, even your best friend. You don’t just have to use these Law of Attraction techniques on a specific person you love.

Don't Play the Blame Game: Understanding the Law of Attraction is not about blaming yourself or anyone else for the negative or unwanted conditions in your life. Getting caught up in this blame game would only serve to attract more of those things that you do not want. Instead, this knowledge is intended to empower you to take full responsibility for your current conditions by understanding the attraction power of your thoughts. Know that by taking responsibility for your life, you also grant yourself the power to change it.
"Finding solutions is essential if we want to make the most of our caring," Gates said. "If we have clear and proven answers anytime an organization or individual asks, 'How can I help?,' then we can get action and we can make sure that none of the caring in the world is wasted. But complexity makes it hard to mark a path of action for everyone who cares, and that makes it hard for their caring to matter."
The Law of Attraction has been popularized in the early 21st century by books and films such as The Secret. This 2006 film and the subsequent book[49] use interviews with New Thought authors and speakers to explain the principles of the proposed metaphysical law that one can attract anything that one thinks about consistently. Writing for the Committee for Skeptical Inquiry, Mary Carmichael and Ben Radford wrote that "neither the film nor the book has any basis in scientific reality", and that its premise contains "an ugly flipside: if you have an accident or disease, it's your fault".[47]
You need to be clear about what you truly want in a relationship, there are lots of questions to be asked here, and the crucial thing is that you be honest with yourself.  Is it a life-long relationship?  Is it a traditional “get married”, raise a family relationship? Is it a committed relationship living apart?  You must decide what you truly want; sending the universe mixed messages via your thoughts will only lead to people who want different types of relationships coming into your life.
Each "failed" relationship has given you clues about what you want in your ideal partner. The problem is, many women and men focus on the negative instead of the positive. For example, by saying that you don't want a man who "puts his work before the relationship," you are focusing on a man who puts work before love and that is the desire you are unconsciously sending out through your energy.
Hi Elizabeth..AJ here again…I bought your book last night and read it in one setting! Good stuff! I will be reading it again today so I can start the work properly and really soak it all in. I have a question…my guy and I haven’t talked to each other for 2 weeks. But we are both still on the dating site we meet on few months ago. I know I am doing no contact, but with him still being able to see me and I being able to see him…does that kill the mystery of him missing me and will it hinder me from fully letting go? I am just trying to stay open and not block anyone that maybe better…even though I want the chance to see where things can go with him with the proper realignment. I just want to open the gate to draw him in and others, to go with what’s best for me. Thanks in advance!
You can’t attract someone who loves you for who you are, if you are not really BEING who you are. Not being yourself because you think there is something wrong with you will also lead you to attracting people who mirror these feelings back to you, which to those unaware of how law of attraction operates, will falsely take these experiences and encounters as ‘proof’ they are right in feeling that way about themselves.
The concept of manifesting destiny, which rests on the Law of Attraction, is the idea that investing positive energy and belief in any desired outcome will allow a person to bring the outcome to fruition. In other words, you have the power to get what you want simply by believing in it. Sound a little crazy? Maybe. But if people swear by it, it's worth at least exploring, right?
Things shift, people change, and your relationships can light up before your very eyes. Easy to do?  Not always.  Life changing?  YES.  Did they change? Nope. It was me, and because of my alignment with who I am, (love) and who they are (love) I am able to have an alternate experience. The Universe gets to deliver that relationship to you on a silver platter – and ways beyond what you thought was possible when you create consistency of thought.

People living today have the same access to the original creators' texts online as people in 1880 had in printed books. It's exactly the same material. You're essentially arguing against yourself because asserting that no one knows for sure about it would have to apply to the people in 1880 as well. Your argument is an appeal to ignorance, which is a logical fallacy. The text in the creators' books is precisely the data he's referring to, a intellectual creation that has absolutely no scientific basis.
How does the law of attraction work if the person you love has moved to a different state? From the beginning he stated he wanted to only be friends because he was not ready for a long term relationship but we did all the things that people do in relationships and agreed to be monogamous. He has left for another state to take care of issues with family/children and says he doesn’t know when he’ll return. We don’t talk/text as before. I really developed strong feelings for him as we spent a lot of time together and I felt they were reciprocated to a point. Not sure what to do at this point. He has all the qualities I want in a friend/husband. I would love for us to be back together but as more than only friends. Please help
The law of attraction is not a magic wand. Because the brain preferentially scans and stores negative experiences, we have to consciously, habitually build the positive mental muscle. We all have layers and layers of stories, limiting beliefs, fears and blocks that have become the interior landscape of our minds and cannot be changed overnight just by thinking positive thoughts.

8) No Support: Since you will always attract what you think about, you need to avoid any type of support groups for people with mental or physical illnesses or for people with similar experiences. Research shows that support groups such as alcoholics anonymous, weight watchers, or breast cancer support are beneficial. The LOA incorrectly predicts that you will make your problems worse.
Imagine you’re having a dream. In that dream what exactly are YOU? Are YOU the physical dream character you identify with? No, of course not — that’s just your dream avatar. YOU are the dreamer. The entire dream occurs within your consciousness. All dream characters are projections of your dream thoughts, including your avatar. In fact, if you learn lucid dreaming, you can even switch avatars in your dream by possessing another character. In a lucid dream, you can do anything you believe you can.
"I'm not saying that's going to happen, but it could be something that does happen, because who they liked, the ex, was more likely the person that you were. When you start to become the best version of yourself, when you start to not live at the effect but you live at the cause, you have more of an ability to hold your own frame of reality. When you hold your own frame, doesn't mean you're egotistically going around and kind of demanding what happens, but when you're grounded in yourself, there's something that's very powerful about it, and you then become less reactive to other people, and that makes you more attractive, and that makes you more your actual self. The second tip that I want to give for you is understanding how to put yourself in the right energy state, and this is about understanding how we must condition ourselves to become that which we prefer, to then attract that which we want. As the most powerful technique that I have for this is being able to ...
After much prayer, fasting and sacrifice, God blessed the church to acquire property at 1518 Gum Branch Road. On October 26, 1997 the members of Abundant Life entered their new church facility with a sanctuary that seats 860 people, multiple classrooms, Abundance of Love and Learning Center, fellowship hall, commercial-style kitchen, Christian bookstore and office wing. Presently, the church is developing a Family Life Center that will provide space for a Children’s Church, restaurant and lounge and exercise facility. The Church ministries consist of: Evangelism, Mission's, Women's, Men's, Single's, Children’s Church, Youth Ministry, Intercessory Prayer, Christian Education, Hospitality, Radio, Advertising, Ushers, Praise Team, Deacon and Deaconess, Pastor's Esteem, Nurses’ Aide, Parking, Security, Greeters, Kitchen, Economic Development, Transportation, Pantomime, Drug and Alcohol Ministry, Health Advisory, Discipleship Training, Dance, Abundance of Love & Learning Center, Abundant Life Christian College and Abundant Life Community Outreach.
You’ve got to put a roadblock on the sled path. Stop telling the OLD story and start telling the NEW story! The NEW story of how you want it to be. The story of what it’s like to be in the most magical, loving relationship with your Soulmate. Starting now. You’re going to start catching yourself when you’re chatting with friends and the OLD story starts to creep out.  Notice it. Then shift to the NEW story.

I find myself admiring these people who seem to surmount insurmountable difficulties simply by not giving up. They suffer embarrassment and sometimes humiliation, and yet they do not give up. Sometimes I see a child in school who is like that, and I know—and I tell the child’s parents-- that that child will turn out okay. I know that child will catch up, because it is the single virtue of persistence that makes for success. (c) Fredric Neuman Follow Dr. Neuman's blog at fredricneumanmd.com/blog or ask questions at fredricneumanmd.com/blog/ask-dr-neuman-advice-column/


Consciously shifting your thoughts is definitely the easier path, but when we first start working with LOA, this can be hard to do because our current belief system of having to take action, hustle and MAKE things happen, is still quite strong and we just can’t buy into this fully even if it resonates with us, and we know there is some truth to this method of bringing what we want into our life. Visualizing is a good tool for uncovering resistance, which is essentially all the reasons we tell ourselves we can’t have what we want, and getting into a good feeling space. One of the most important things is not to worry about getting super-specific. Don’t worry about figuring our what this person looks like, exactly what he is like, just try to get into the feelings. Trying to get too specific with the type of person can trigger a lot of resistance, and may even actually clog up the channels of receiving because you may get too attached to this person having to be a very specific way.


When you want something so bad, whether it’s your own business, love, a better marriage, whatever it is, and you get so obsessed with wanting it that you won’t allow yourself to be happy unless you obtain it, you go through life in a desparate lower frequency state. This desperation throws you into a Pseudo Self. You start living outside in instead of inside out. Your gifts become dimmed which means you become less potent. You pack less punch in this world. You also become angry and resentful. So your state changes and your energy beomes low. You then start go through life crossing fingers and hoping. The longer this happens, the less you believe. And if you don’t believe, you won’t put any action behind building anything. Now you watch others build their dreams and become a spectator. Sound familiar? Basically, you give up. Then you hear about a fast easy concept that can save you. There’s a chance you can still get what you want! A vine to pull you out of your quicksand. Of course you’re going to jump on that train.
When you want something so bad, whether it’s your own business, love, a better marriage, whatever it is, and you get so obsessed with wanting it that you won’t allow yourself to be happy unless you obtain it, you go through life in a desparate lower frequency state. This desperation throws you into a Pseudo Self. You start living outside in instead of inside out. Your gifts become dimmed which means you become less potent. You pack less punch in this world. You also become angry and resentful. So your state changes and your energy beomes low. You then start go through life crossing fingers and hoping. The longer this happens, the less you believe. And if you don’t believe, you won’t put any action behind building anything. Now you watch others build their dreams and become a spectator. Sound familiar? Basically, you give up. Then you hear about a fast easy concept that can save you. There’s a chance you can still get what you want! A vine to pull you out of your quicksand. Of course you’re going to jump on that train.
And, just as an important side note: Your subconscious is way, way more powerful than you possibly give it credit for. Most people don’t realize this fact. Your subconscious knows exactly what you’re going to do. It’s infinitely more aware of what’s happening in the universe than your conscious mind. It simply won’t be bullied. It’s happy for you to tell it what to do, once you master the process of doing so.

Hi, My boyfriend has been dating on and off for almost 4 years. I love with with all of my heart. Ive dated other guys when we were on our downtime, but none of them compared to him. Im so insecure in our relationship because he has 4 kids by 3 different women. Right now I feel so stuck because I love him amd dont want to lose him, but sometimes the pressure is too much…can u give me advice please..
I was in a ten year relationship with my child’s father, but he was a cheater. Eventually I started seeing other people years down the line, mind you our relationship was up and down. Long story short I became pregnant with another’s man baby, which was hurtful to the both of us. I still felt a sense of this happening wasn’t all my fault I feel like he played a role as well. I used to beg him to get our relationship back on track for about three years so finally I gave up because of continuous cheating. Well finally last year we I thought we were getting somewhere and boom came to find out the cheating never stopped, well I left again to begin a new relationship which didn’t work out either plus here’s another baby on the way. Finally the guy that I was with for ten years we started seeing each other again during my pregnancy, but the catch is he wants me to give up baby for adoption. We were broken up for seven months and really I feel my child isn’t his business. Nonetheless, for some odd reason I still love and want to be with him, but if he can’t accept the children, then I have to depart from him. How do me and the children attract him for a positive family oriented relationship?

In 2006, the concept of the Law of Attraction gained a lot of renewed exposure with the release of the film The Secret (2006) which was then developed into a book of the same title in 2007. The movie and book gained widespread media coverage.[1][21][22] Rhonda Byrne's book also has influenced the creation of an untitled fiction film based on The Secret, starring Katie Holmes.[23] This was followed by a sequel, The Power in 2010 that talks about the law of attraction being the law of love.[24]
I understand your scepticism about the LOA as I am someone who is open minded about it. However, I kind of lost confidence in your arguments when you started to present basic premises about the LOA incorrectly. For example, the primary focus of the law of attraction is not about material wealth. It is about self development, self love and the journey to self completeness within the context of mindfulness and positive thinking. This is a premise that is widely used within peer researched clinical therapies as well as many religions. Proponents of the law of attraction do not campaign for everyone to achieve selfish material gain and wealth. I have not heard or read anyone, no matter what level in their LOA journey that they are at. Their point is about the power of a positive mindset, a principle I am very much a supporter of and as I said, this is not unique to the LOA.
I really enjoy reading your posts and learning about opening up to deep and fulfilling love. After heart shattering loss over the course of the last two years I am now in the process of putting myself back together again. It’s still pretty messy but I really want to learn to love myself and be the best version of myself, for me and for my soulmate who I know is out there waiting for me to be ready for forever.
Deal-breaker items could include: if the person has some form of alcohol or substance addiction or abuse, if they are married or in another relationship, if they are physically or verbally abusive, and even if they smoke.  For some people, smoking is not a big deal, but for me, I just can’t stand kissing someone after they’ve had a smoke, so I decided to include it in my deal-breaker list.  What are your deal- breakers? All you need is three.
"It may not be exactly as you imagine it – say you make $35,000 as a writer and you imagine making $100,000. You may get an offer in a different field that meets the money requirement or possibly a different style of writing than you might be used to or an assignment that you did not expect. Point is, you will get what you ask for, even if it is not exactly as you had imagined. Now if you have no job and no income and ask for a Maserati, you probably won’t get it. You might, however, meet a new friend who has one and get to drive it," Estes states clearly.
I know the LOA says when you want to manifest a specific person you have to be willing to lose them – you have to let go and be ok with not being with them in order to manifest the relationship you want. It also says that you should visualize the relationship you want with this person as if you already have it. How can one do both? How can I imagine being in a relationship with this person but let them go and be ok with not the being with them at the same time?
There is no real risk to chasing your dreams. As far as I can tell, it’s a lot of fun and a thrilling journey. My experience with countless clients over many, many years, is that all the risk…all the frustration…and all the disappointment, is born from not chasing dreams. (But please remember, there is a way to chase dreams successfully which is like chasing butterflies. Put yourself in the right energy field, and become a magnet for those butterflies. The more direct method of butterfly catching is so much harder).
The better your relationship with yourself, the better chances you have of finding a great relationship with someone else. Remember, attraction is all about how we feel, and nothing will get you into a better feeling space to let love in, than genuinely loving yourself more. Yeah, yeah, that hippy dippy love yourself stuff. The more you these types of sentiments rub you the wrong way, the more you need to work on it, trust me.
Your soul is created for a connection to twin and God and is very powerful and brings you directly toward God because the soul receives Divine Love flowing inside and is the same way God loves you. God created you in the same image of him and twin also. You cant stop loving twin, there is no limit no matter how separated you are, they are with you energetically for they are part of the Divine in you. They know you love them. Love them for who they are and allow the divine powers to teach them what love is. He teaches the twins to live in truth and dont hide from each other and no shame or guilt and be vulnerable. Soul love opens doors at the soul level to obey and listen to the lesson you need to learn. You were made for ea other to unite in Soul Love and have same Divine love vibration. Your soul vibration and love in soul is the only one which has to be taken by twin, nobody else can take or match. God gives vibration and creates you and from that vibration created another one made in your image and likeness for each other. Eve was given to Adam as his twin flame as a helpmate. A pure Divine Love inside given from God to love unconditionally. Powerful Divine Love inside will open the door to unite to twin. You could be having dreams about them and show you everything in order for you to awaken and to open your soul to the precious gift given to you to find perfect Divine Soul Love as you live by the truth. When things are in place door opens. Powerful love inside will not die. A deep love inside of soul of who you are as Divine Beings for you are both ONE soul connected to God. So Be It. As it was in the Beginning, So Is It Now In the End. Return as One Sacred Flame to Source of Where YOU Came From in Light and Love shining radiance from Your Eyes. lol and hugs to all. Love and Light, Uriel
I am trained as a "hard science" PhD in Pharmacology and do understand scientific method. The LOA is not based on scientific method and the erroneous conclusions in metaphysics are based on incorrect scientific assumptions. These assumptions may have seemed reasonable in the 1800s that there was no air around us, only ether and that thoughts only transmit through ether. Perhaps this assumption is correct, however we are not surrounded by ether.
Thank you so much for explaining the term soulmate, i felt i had met my true one, but because of past life experiences, we drifted apart, i still feel he is the one, so i will start my manifestation, as you have explained. I did meet with him in passing, a week ago, and he acted so awkward towards me, a lot of things have happened in the last 18 months, but i feel we are going to reconnect, i also feel our time apart was needed, as we were not in a healthy place, i wasn’t personally because of the loss of so many close family members. But i now feel on the right path, so thank you again for explaining things in great detail.
Step 1 is important because it prepares your mind and body to receive whatever you’re asking for. Our brains don’t know the difference between reality and imagination. When you engage in full, sensory imagination, your brain fires up your body to move forward. Muscles, blood flow, heart, lungs and every part of your body gear up to take part in whatever you’re imagining.
As for manifestations that involve another person, you probably don’t want to put too much focus on that because we can’t create in another person’s reality. No matter what we do with our energy, it can’t ‘translate’ to someone else and make them do anything. Now, this isn’t to say that you can’t ever get back together with this person, as that may possibly be the best representation of the energy and feelings that you are trying to attract into your life–remember that no matter what we want, we are always after a feeling. What also happens sometimes is when we make changes in our own energy, we line up with different ‘versions’ of people, even if they have fundamentally stayed the same, and this can make it easier to get along with them,etc…
Law of Attraction Affirmations can take the form of internal thoughts or spoken words, but they can also be represented visually. Regardless of how you choose to use them, you can design them to reflect your vision of how you want your life to change. For example, many people have great success speaking affirming words into the mirror before going to work, or stating “today is going to be a great day” to infuse themselves with positivity upon waking. When used frequently enough, affirmations can enhance your use of the Law of Attraction by helping to reshape the core beliefs and assumptions that may be holding you back. They promote consistency, optimism and intense focus on the future you want to create.
Don’t wait for science to catch up several hundred years from now. Use the power of love, attraction and transformation NOW. Just because you can’t see angels and wise mentors in front of you right now, doesn’t mean you can’t imagine them as true and reap the benefits. You have the same opportunity as anyone else to make this quantum imagination jump.
Shelly Bullard, MFT is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Love Coach and Spiritual Teacher. She's the author of the eBook: How to Become the Most Attractive Version of Yourself which she offers for FREE (click here to receive your free copy). She's also the instructor of the popular mbg courses: How To Become The Most Attractive Version of Yourself & How to Attract a Partner Who's Ready for Deep, Devoted Love. Shelly believes that when you access the experience of Love within yourself, your relationships become deeply fulfilling and you become the person you’re meant to be. She was named the “Love Guru” as one of the 100 Women to Watch in Wellness by mindbodygreen, and her deepest passion is living and practicing love and relationships as a spiritual path. To learn more about how she can help you create more love in your life, visit her at: shellybullard.com.
Luck. We like to think that luck has nothing to do with success, but it does. Of course it does. Luck influences where we are born, what access to education we have, who we marry, how healthy we are and what opportunities present themselves to us. There are things we can do to maximize our chances of “getting lucky,” however, and it is these that have a further bearing on success.
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